I've had nightmares two nights since Saturday, and both involve the same subject: My wedding.

In my nightmare Saturday night, every worst-case scenario in my wedding happened. But that wasn't all. It looked like that scene from Beavis and Butthead Do America, when Beavis and Butthead were tripping on peyote in the desert.

On Sunday, somehow my weeding reception turned into some freaky bar mitzvah. Not only that, the photographer completely missed the ceremony because he got stuck in the drive-thru line at McDonald's. About two-thirds of the way through my dream, it turned into some sort of video game or something like it. I was split into two different characters -- one that looked just like me and a tall blonde girl named Jessica.

During one scene of it, therein lay two paths. One named "Terror" and one named "Humor." Naturally, which one did you think I picked? However, what I thought lay ahead wasn't the case. Their roles were reversed. Terror was humor, humor was terror. Jessica went through a great ordeal with a bevy of monsters. I was waiting outside the doors of the two pathways, waiting for my next assignment. I eventually had to rescue Jessica from flesh-ripping skeletons.

Then I (we) chose the other path named "Terror" (which really was "Humor") and I...didn't know what to make of it. It was certainly better than skeletons and big ogres wielding spiked clubs, though. We were floating. We were floating through the air, as if gravity didn't matter and weight wasn't an issue. We were floating though a gigantic ballroom. There were all sorts of people in formal wear getting rowdy..perhaps a bit too rowdy.

And then I woke up.