Current mood:

depressed

update depression

Im depressed and lonely and i just dont know what to do...I can't take this anymore...I did have potiential bfs but one guy decided to go ahead and tell me that he started to date someone and i was like uhh okay whatever at least he told me thats good...and this one guy is married i've liked him for the longest but i can't do anything about it because hes married and im not a home wrecker...

I did meet this one guy last night that i have been talking to for a bit...hes cute we made out but i dont know if he really likes me i dont know he said he does i guess i will have to be patient...but at the sametime if you just want a piece of ass or something then let me know so i can stop talking to you...but if he really is straight up which i hope then he would be a good candiate for a relationship...

then there is my friends brother  but he lives in idaho i really like him hes cool and we talk a lot he says that hes coming here in june to visit i told him to move back to NC because in idaho he got mixed up with a bad crowd and hes unhappy there and he wants to be close to his sister (my friend) but doesnt want to leave his brothers kids alone because his brother is in jail for something that literally wasnt his fault...

I have no father and no mother....i know i have the rest of my family but i wish i had my parents maybe one day my dad will wake the fuck up until then i told him dont ever call me until you do and if doesnt ever wake up then he doesnt ever wake up and thats on him not me...Hes like you're going to dictate my life i'm not dictating your life im dictating my own and if you still want to lie and let some bitch manipulate you to erase your kids then so be it....shes no christian and she needs to check herself before she goes around saying that she is one.

Anyways i dont want to work today...im tired of working on the wkends...you know what they did...for my schedule i have fuckin school next week and they have me working everyday during the week except for one day and im off saturday and then i work sunday night wtf....i have so much shit to do for school this is going to be hard im gonna be up late doing shit for the next 2 months until school ends....i know i have some important tests coming up and such....and 2 10 page papers due...FUCK!