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legendarytits ([info]legendarytits) wrote,
@ 2009-06-27 02:04:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:clinic tour

The Clinic
Hey, everyone. Just so you know, every single staff member, actor or not, can come see me for medical care anytime. But I expect to see anyone having sex for money on screen or off either at Feel Good, Inc. or over at Angel's Hell weekly for an STD checkup. Buckle up kids, it's the law. I take all forms of insurance or cash for services. Now I know some of you have never been to the in-house clinic before, so I'll give you a little tour.


When you step through that glass-paneled door into my office space, the reception desk is the first thing you see.
Image and video hosting by TinyPic


I might be at the desk there, filling out medical paperwork. Don't worry if it's in piles; I know which file is where in there (mostly).
Image and video hosting by TinyPic


If I'm in the examination room with another patient the reception desk might be empty. Just wait patiently for me to finish and come back out... or if it's an emergency (or you're the big boss), come and find me. I'm probably here in the exam room:
Image and video hosting by TinyPic


If I'm not there, I might be in the lab just across from the examination room, running tests on your lovely patient samples. This place is off limits. We don't want any contamination going on, do we?
Image and video hosting by TinyPic


Office hours are 10am to 7pm, and you can walk in to make an appointment. Or email me. Or call my cell. Don't be afraid to come in and see me or just to chat; I'm here to care for you and make sure you're all healthy and doing alright. On that note, I also have condoms, dental dams, and birth control pills free to give away to any employee who asks, so please ask. Hell, I'll even leave an open box by the reception desk and you all can just take what you need.

Any questions? Concerns?



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[info]legendarytits
2009-06-29 10:59 pm UTC (link)
It depends on the test. Most STDs I can test just by taking a q-tip sample from just inside your penis and your rectum (if you ever take it in the ass), or by having you pee in a cup.

But once a month you'll have to give a small blood sample so I can test you for HIV, syphilis, and inactive herpes.

So there are only needles involved once a month. Does that answer your question, Sai?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]chinpo
2009-06-29 11:51 pm UTC (link)
I never had a q-tip inside of my penis. It sounds painful.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]legendarytits
2009-06-29 11:58 pm UTC (link)
It'll be uncomfortable, but very quick. I'm good at what I do.

...And you get a lollipop afterward. If that helps.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]chinpo
2009-06-30 12:30 am UTC (link)
How can I believe you? Do you have a certificate or something to prove it? There are a lot of quacks running around these parts.

I'd like tofu better. Do you got any of that?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]legendarytits
2009-06-30 12:40 am UTC (link)
My diplomas and doctor's certificates are all hanging up on the wall behind the reception desk. And really? I don't think there are any quacks running around in Reno. Anyone practicing medicine without a license would be jailed or worse.

... I'm glad you like tofu better than lollipops; it's a lot better for you. I'll bring some for you on the days you have appointments, alright?

(Reply to this)(Parent)


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