uchiha ][ sasuke (equate) wrote,
@ 2009-10-29 12:04:00

Entry tags:

cell phone plz???, fuck his life, not amused, not paco, tokyo... police..., wtf wtf wtf

OCT. 14, 2009

Dear Mr. Uchiha:

This letter is to confirm your investigation petition of OCTOBER 2009 .

As you are aware, property theft is a serious offense that the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department Statistics Office has determined has a 9.51% probability of a favourable conclusion to the complainant.

The officer delegated to this investigation is MORITA KEICHIRO. His reports will be enclosed.

Thank you for your cooperation. Your safety is important to us.

Lt. Adachi Naomi
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Administration Office

OCT. 18, 2009

Mr. Uchiha:

My team and I are proud to inform you that our department has recently been awarded with two highly trained military dogs.

We believe this to be relevant to your pending search investigation, should the sought object contain a 45% or higher concentration of radioactive substances or narcotics.

Morita Keichiro
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Community Police Affairs Section

Dear Mr. Uchiha:

We will forward your second petition for a stalking warrant against CARMEN DEFUENTA to our Criminal Investigation Department.

Your safety is important to us.

Lt. Adachi Naomi
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Administration Office

Mr. Uchiha:

The unidentified object my team and I believe to meet the description of your phone has been confiscated as secondary evidence in a civil trial that the defendant claims will prove the existence of 'alien life force.' (Enclosed ref. court order #866-31.)

Under clause IIA.90.718, our search investigation loses priority to a pending litigation. We are obligated to cease our search for the duration.

Morita Keichiro
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Community Police Affairs Section

-

...

Ah. Karma.

Black Ericsson, 'equate' engraved in rōmaji on the side.

Compensation for its return.

[ooc: ...in which he tried to recover the cell phone he lost in a club and failed horribly. FHL. If you want your character to've found it in a club, go for it - only requirement is to make the discovery story as gd whacky as the above XD]

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

	.........it's a parody song by the Lonely Island o.o; equate 2009-10-30 07:03 pm UTC (link)
	You know better. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	... how would I even know that dsnfksjfksfd impellere 2009-10-30 07:19 pm UTC (link)
	I try to not live out nightmares. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	*you know it's infamous when even I* know it >_>; equate** 2009-10-30 07:28 pm UTC (link)
	Regression, Uzumaki. You've gone from discussing the weather to discussing your... inevitable parthenogenesis. [ooc: here.] (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Ahah links are wasted on me. This comp lacks audio. impellere 2009-10-30 07:41 pm UTC (link)
	Only socially retarded people use big words, Uchiha. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	XD; well, it's a funny piece. equate 2009-10-30 07:45 pm UTC (link)
	...asexual reproduction, Naruto. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	I will ttly watch it after work xD impellere 2009-10-30 07:50 pm UTC (link)
	Ow and ow. No wonder you're such a dick. You need to get laid. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	how are you rping from a registry. i can't even. watch 'on a boat' by them, too. equate 2009-10-30 08:21 pm UTC (link)
	What I need is a new strategy to get you bored or infuriated enough to leave me alone. Hmmmm.... (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	n-no it just lacks speakers. I suffer through it. :( impellere 2009-10-30 08:37 pm UTC (link)
	Bring it on. I got all day to watch you try and fail. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	oh, you poor victim =_= equate 2009-10-30 09:02 pm UTC (link)
	Haruno's right: discrimination is such an ugly thing. I think I'll start charging you too. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	. . . for once could you coddle me sans reject :< impellere 2009-10-30 09:13 pm UTC (link)
	. . . I expect better service if I have to pay for this. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	.....everyone else does that already >_> Too much and you get spoiled. equate 2009-10-30 09:20 pm UTC (link)
	You'll take what I give, if I give it. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	whu- who told you... THEY ALL SMACK ME. WITH HATE. impellere 2009-10-30 09:24 pm UTC (link)
	You give it 'cause you want to. I could care less either way. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	equate 2009-10-30 09:30 pm UTC (link)
	~~So easy.~~ Prove it. ¥ 3000, for two words. Money, from you, Uzumaki, because you don't have any. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	impellere 2009-10-30 09:36 pm UTC (link)
	I might be broke and that's alright with me. You're money still ain't good enough, Sasuke. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	now I have to count each word, sob. equate 2009-10-30 09:44 pm UTC (link)
	No, that would be my fee for the two words. The update on your charge balance and associated punctuation are free. See, Uzumaki, my new strategy: you can either leave, which is the desired outcome, or you can live with the repeated reality of having to pay for polite conversation. ¥ 75,000. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	you brought this on yourself impellere 2009-10-30 09:46 pm UTC (link)
	I'm. Not. Paying. You. Creep-o. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	SPEAKING OF PEOPLE WHO REJECT WITHOUT CODDLING X( equate 2009-10-30 10:13 pm UTC (link)
	Then I'm done indulging you. ¥ 9,000. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	WHAT. impellere 2009-11-07 12:58 am UTC (link)
	You never got that hug did you. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	YEAH THAT'S RIGHT WHERE'S MY LOVE AT X ( equate 2009-11-07 01:16 am UTC (link)
	I don't remember. May I hit you? ¥ 10,500. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Right here. In my lap. impellere 2009-11-07 01:20 am UTC (link)
	You probably have girl fists. I'll only charge half price. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	weguuewriuhwr CAN'T YOU AIM FOR A PG ANSWER ONE OF THESE DAYS. equate 2009-11-07 01:29 am UTC (link)
	I'll probably break knuckles. Inconsequential. You don't charge. ¥ 15,000. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	. . . Hello, I'm Ash. impellere 2009-11-07 01:33 am UTC (link)
	I'd charge for having to witness your powderpuff girl smack. ¥ 500 (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Hello, Pervert-chan >_>; equate 2009-11-07 01:46 am UTC (link)
	~~Don't be stupid.~~ Do you have dreams? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	:Da impellere 2009-11-07 01:50 am UTC (link)
	You don't? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	equate 2009-11-07 01:54 am UTC (link)
	What are yours? Today. ~~¥ 6,000.~~ (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)