the devil tips his hat to me
I wasn't going to say this, but honestly? mei's post made me think, mostly because they're my own thoughts-- er, kind of. I might be echoing her, but I hope that by me saying something this time, people will try and listen. Maybe, just maybe, more than one person saying it will make people think.

Perhaps I am overstepping my boundaries, because I am not sure what happened tonight. I don't know most of the people involved and all I know is what a friend told me. I don't know what was said and I do not know why it became the shitstorm it became. Because, to me, as an outsider, it was something that could have been resolved had more than one person had enough balls to IM each other and apologize. I don't know who was wrong, but in situations like these, I believe everyone is wrong. A snide comment hurts, but sometimes it's not worth a friendship. No, let me rephrase that, it's never worth a friendship. The good comes with the bad, period. End of story. We as people are going to butt heads. It's natural, it's normal. It's not unusual. But it's nothing to throw a friendship away over.

When you hurt someone, you can't really make it better. Because what's done is done, and the words have already been said or the actions have already happened. All you can do is apologize and move on. That's the ideal goal, what's right in my mind, but a lot of people disagree. I apologize, perhaps my ideals are immature, or unrealistic, maybe even childish. But you know, I wouldn't be above assuming I'm not the only one who thinks this.

I'm not saying one person was wrong -- I think everyone involved made a mistake here tonight that is more than forgiveable, it's something that you can grow past. Because it was just a mistake, right? A misunderstanding that went too far. Or at least, that's what it seems to be.

I know that a lot of people think I'm stupid for saying all this. But I'm just sick of seeing people I care about hurt... and seeing people I don't even know hurt. It breaks my heart because this is all resolveable. It always is. You can be stubborn and hold it over your pal's head or you can forgive them and keep them as a friend. Or maybe I'm the only person in the world who views everyone I'm friends with as special and important... I don't know. It feels that way, what with all the drama and such.

I'm not... mad or anything. I'm just really tired and pained over all this that keeps happening. Every week it's something new, something that could be nothing.

Recently, my ex-girlfriend, who is still a friend, broke up with me. We had our little spat, between myself, her and her girlfriend, but we all resolved it. I forgave her for things she said, and she forgave me for being a jealous bitch, and Sis forgave me for... well, being so rude to her. We've resolved it, and we're as close as ever.

See? It's avoidable. We didn't lynch each other. We didn't drag it out. Liz and I resolved it within, literally, 48 hours. And on top of that, we kept our dirty laundry covered as best we could. I kept most of, if not all of it, to myself.

I'm babbling, I know. But I want to get my point across: you can talk about it, you don't have to kill each other over it, you know?

I also want to say that I love each and every one of you on my flist. If you've ever doubted why you're on my flist... don't. I love you all, and you're all special to me in some way. You might piss me off sometimes, but you also amaze me with your strengths! So please do not ever doubt yourself or give up. Always fight to the death, got it? I'll kick your ass if you don't.

I'm done. Flame me, praise me, do as you will. I said my piece... my uninvited piece, I suppose. But I hope I got my point across. Make love, not war, my tree-hugging friends. :D~