Danielle tried to get Erin's voice out of her head as Donovan led her into his Head Boy suite, but she couldn't. She couldn't shake the words, no matter how innocent they'd been, and now Danielle was nearly ready to hyperventilate.

Oh, are you staying the night?

Stay the night? Why had Erin wondered that? In all the years she and Donovan had been dating, had she ever stayed the night? What did 'stay the night' even mean? Did it mean what Danielle thought it meant? Did Erin think that it meant what Danielle thought she meant it meant?

"Are you all right?"

Donovan's concerned voice broke through Danielle's frantic thoughts. Her eyes went wide and she shook her head, smiling and pushing away from him to look around the room. "I've just never seen a Head's suite before."

The bookcases were filled with books and she enjoyed the small details carved into the wood. Danielle smirked at the green and silver theme that was obvious around the room, and she turned back to Donovan after taking her quick, few steps tour.

"I'm very proud of you," she said, letting her panic subside to take in the moment. Her boyfriend had worked very hard for this position and had been up against stiff competition for the badge. Danielle knew Donovan was the right man for the job, and it would be very interesting to see how he became accustomed to the role of Head Boy.

His slow grin dissolved any concern she might still have about the implications of coming into this room. Danielle crossed back to Donovan and kissed him, happy that he obliged and pulled her toward him. Maybe it would be good, to have this private place with Donovan. They could absolutely get more studying done, especially with N.E.W.T.s this year. They'd be able to have some time to talk without one of his friends interrupting, because they always interrupted whether it was intentionally or not. When the Great Hall was too loud and boisterous to carry on a conversation during meal times, they could come here to---

Danielle's eyes flew open as they somehow managed to drop down onto his bed. She tried to continue kissing him, because they had snogged on a bed before, but it had been a bed that was in a room that didn't have a locked door, or there were other people beyond the curtains of the four-poster and----she jerked away from him, her lips pulling away from his with a smack and jumping to her feet.

"Danielle, what's wrong!" Donovan let out, sounding more concerned than annoyed, she thought he was going to be annoyed. Danielle wrung her hands together, pacing from the bed to the door, unsure of why she was so scared of being here, it wasn't as if Donovan had pressured her before, and they'd been dating since the end of fourth year. Any normal guy would have left her by now for not---but Donovan had never questioned her intentions, he'd never made her feel bad about stopping things before they went too far.

But what if that was because they'd never had a chance to go that far? Danielle felt her breath get sharp and Donovan nearly scared her out of her skin as he stood in front of her, stopping her nearly manic pace. His hands went to her shoulders and she was forced to look him in the eye.

"Am I staying the night?" she whispered quickly, flushing deeply at the connotations. Donovan blinked at her, his expression changing from concern to confusion. His grip on her slackened and his hands slid around her neck to hang loosely.

"If...you wanted to?" he answered slowly. Danielle bit her tongue and Donovan shrugged, "Do you mind sharing a bed with me?"

Danielle shook her head quickly; she did not mind, but he was not understanding. Or maybe he was, and was just being the sly, quick-witted Donovan she'd always known. Maybe he was playing with his words, and just trying to relax her. Donovan moved closer once again and Danielle let out a breath, pushing her head into his shoulder.

"You don't have to stay," he said, his arms around her tightening into a warm embrace. Oh, he did understand. Danielle's arms slid around his waist. He wasn't even thinking about sex, or if he was, he wasn't going to bring it up until she did. Her eyes shut and she nodded, her grip on him growing tighter. Good, this was good. She'd stay the night.

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Danielle stared up at the perfectly clear summer night and wondered how she could feel so sad on such a beautiful night. She wiped the tears from her face and took a breath, hearing someone climbing along the shingles of their roof behind her. Danielle's 'spot' in her family home had always been this section of their roof that jutted out over the backyard, just enough that it blocked any porch lights and let the shine of the sun or moon bounce off of the small pond they had sparkling down below. Rian would sometimes make it up there with her, but he wasn't as much of an explorer as she was. Her father said she got that from him, but Danielle tended to think otherwise.

"Couldn't sleep?"

She sniffled and turned toward her mother, the only person who regularly visited her up here. Danielle shrugged and dropped her chin to her pulled up knees, staring out at the lake that was reflecting the moon and stars. Maria Kettleburn, whose features were the exact opposite of Danielle, moved closer and let out a sigh. Danielle shut her eyes as her mother's hand began to comb through her hair.

"Too excited?"

Danielle shook her head, opening her eyes as more tears crashed down her cheeks, "I don't--I don't know if I can go, Mum..."

"You have to go, Danni." Her mothers voice was stern, and Danielle looked at her once again, her teeth chattering with her tears. Maria looked quite serious and her daughter felt herself cower back under her strong gaze, "This is a once in a life time opportunity that you can't pass up or you'll regret it for the rest of your life."

She knew this. Danielle knew this in her very logical mind that it would be stupid to lose out on the chance to go and study medicine in Colombia. She'd just finished her first year of internship and to be offered such a prestigious grant...it was something that no one in her family had ever seen before, and she could really make a mark on the world of plant-based potions...it was what she'd been working toward since she bought her first Hogwarts text book. There was only one thing, one person stopping her, making her question taking the trek across the world.

"I don't want to leave Donovan," she let out, nearly choking on his name. Her Donovan, the boy who had stuck by her through her crazy study sessions and through the years of anxiety ridden nights before exams. He loved her, he loved her so much, and she loved him so much that she felt like her heart was shredding itself in her chest at the thought of leaving him behind. He wanted her to stay, he wanted her to choose him and she wanted to choose him so, so badly...

Maria moved quickly, taking Danielle's chin in her hand to force her daughter to look at her, "If you stay here because of a boy, you will always regret it, Danielle. That's not a threat, it's not an idea, it's a promise." Danielle felt her throat close up at the words. "You will be with him, and you'll start a family and do what all the normal people do here, and you will, deep down in your chest, hate and resent him for making you lose out on this journey."

"I couldn't hate----" Danielle tried to interject, but her mother shook her head fiercely, letting go of her grip on her chin.

"No! You will!" Maria kicked out at the roof, kicking a shingle straight off and sending it into the pond, "You will hate him, Danielle, and you'll hate your life for what it could have been and what you let it become, you'll sit home while your husband goes off and does amazing things and comes home with missing limbs----"

"Mum!"

Danielle gaped at her mother, sitting up, her hands pressing into the roof. Maria had a look of wild contempt on her face and she couldn't keep her daughter's gaze. Danielle had...she had never thought her mother was unhappy, but the tone of her voice just now, the look of absolute rage and regret...She felt her shoulders begin to shake as a new batch of tears came upon her.

"You can't make my mistake, Danni, please," Maria said softly, reaching out for her daughter's hand. Danielle gripped her mother's hand back and nodded. She let out a great, shuddering breath and leaned heavily into her mother.

"I wrote him a letter," she said softly, finding comforting as her mother began to play with her hair again. Danielle rung her hands together, "I want to give it to him tomorrow before I leave, it says---"

"That's private, yeah?" Maria said with light laugh. Danielle nodded. It would be hard to say goodbye to Donovan, but she'd poured her heart out into the letter, a form of communication she'd always used with him because she was better at articulating her feelings through the quill than her own, stuttering voice. She'd told him that he did not have to wait for her, but if he did, he should know that she'd never fall out of love with him.

They stayed up on the roof for a bit, her mother mentioning that her portkey had been moved to an hour earlier than they'd thought and that she should get to bed. Danielle worried that Donovan wouldn't get her owl in time, but her mother promised, she promised that she'd already told him, and that he would be there to set her off. That was good, it was good, things...they'd be good.

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It had been very...difficult to remain focused and in control these past few months. Danielle had spent most of Donovan's time in prison at work, trying to get as many hours and as many shifts as possible. She would take on patients that she had never seen before, she would perform procedures that she'd only tried in Colombia with limited tools. She had forced her sharp mind to focus on everything but the fact that Donovan could be going to Azkaban for the rest of his life.

When he was released, when he had decided to testify against Augustus to bring some justice to the world, Danielle had felt a great relief. The feeling only lasted until Donovan had come home, and she found him beyond miserable about his decisions. Her mind then began to focus on him, and making him happy, and using whatever time she couldn't be with him or at work on the wedding they would have, some time. She was thinking September, they met for the first time on September 1st, it would be appropriate. It wouldn't be a big thing, it would just be their friends and family, and it would be splendid.

She thought it would be splendid. After her fight with her brother about his concerns over Donovan, Danielle had lost the focus she so desperately needed to remain functioning. She'd worked her mind and body into such a frenzy that the shudder of Rian's disapproval and his inability to confirm that he would indeed be attending her wedding shattered her calm and ready exterior. She found herself owling St. Mungo's that she had become ill and had crawled into bed hours before Donovan was to be home and cried. She hadn't cried in what felt like years, and the sound of the bedroom door opening surprised her, she'd been so engulfed with her sadness. Danielle was hidden under the covers and the light of the room was just bright enough to shoot through the thin blankets.

"Dani?"

"Under here."

Danielle pursed her lips at the chuckle that came from him, and she heard the clunk of his shoes hit the floor before the mattress moved and Donovan was under the covers with her. She felt embarrassed the second he frowned, knowing that her face was ripe with the evidence of how much she'd cried today. Donovan shifted to lie down, his arm reaching out to pull her to him and Danielle now wished she'd owled him to come home on his lunch break, or to come home and stay home because just being close to him and being in his arms made her feel like there was some sort of hope that things would finally go their way.

"Why are you sad?" he asked softly, pressing his cheek to the top of her head. Danielle's eyes immediately watered. She did not want to put more of a burden on Donovan's shoulders, these trying months had been torture trying to keep as much stress away from his as possible. How could she upset him with the news about her brother, that she was upset because of everything? Danielle had to be the strong one because she hadn't given up her family, she hadn't had to deal with a society that didn't accept you for who you were. Donovan was so strong for managing to go through everything he had been going through, but it took its toll.

"I feel as if no one wants us to be happy," she let out, a new wave of sobs wracking through her chest. It was as honest of an answer as she was going to be able to produce at the moment, and Donovan's tightened grip around her reflected the idea that he felt the same way.

"I love you, please don't forget that," he hushed into her hair. Danielle nodded, croaking back that she loved him too, glad that they would both lie together in this current state of misery.

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Their morning routines were just that, routine. Their alarms would go off together, usually set for a good half hour before they really needed to start getting ready for work, to give them time for a good morning work-out of the best kind. Danielle appreciated the regularity of her mornings with her husband, but last night they had spent more time on the floor of their bathroom than under the sheets. She felt like the only woman in the world who got morning sickness in the middle of the night, and it made waking up for anything very difficult. Donovan had been with her every minute of this past miserable night, holding back her hair and comforting her which Danielle was grateful for. It would be a miracle if either of them managed to get out of bed to go to work today, and it wasn’t until there were warm streaks of sun streaming from their window and into her face that Danielle finally arose. Her vision was bleary and took a few seconds to focus, and her eyes landed on the clock on the other side of the bed.

“Don’t!”

Danielle had let out a gasp at the same time as Donovan’s voice came from behind her. She flipped over on the bed, looking startled and confused, wondering how it was ten-thirty and she was not at St. Mungo’s for her seven to six o’clock shift! Danielle’s mind was running around in circles and after a few seconds was able to focus on her husband, who was still in his sleepwear and definitely not in his dress robes for work.

“We’re late!” she let out, moving to get out of bed, but Donovan stepped forward quickly with his hand out. He pushed her gently back against the pillows, his eyes teasing, but with a knowing glint.

“You’re not going to work today,” he said, smiling when she let out another indignant sound. Danielle had not missed a shift in years, and the one time she had was when she had come to the hospital with a one hundred and four fever and her resident had confined her to a bed. She pushed up on her elbows, still twitching to get up, but her husband seemed insistent and actually sat on the edge of the bed, putting his hands on her legs to keep her in place, “I already sent Healer Wood an owl, and I sent my supervisor one as well. You need rest.”

Her eyes widened at this; a whole day with Donovan? She got to stay home, no questions asked? No rushed lunch dates or dinner at ten o’clock? His explanation very much eased her worry about work, and Danielle felt tears prickle her eyes. Not only had this pregnancy given her ridiculous morning sickness, but her emotions were now extreme. Donovan taking her schedule into his own hands, taking his and rearranging it so that he could be with her when she hadn’t asked for help was just remarkable, and Danielle’s lips twisted as she tried to keep her composure.

“It’ll do you no good to cry,” he said with a light laugh, reaching forward to wipe away her tears. Danielle’s hands shot up to keep his knuckles against her cheek, and her husband smiled once again, “I’ve got breakfast waiting downstairs, don’t want to soak it.”

Danielle nodded; she’d been able to smell food within a mile radius these days, it seemed, but for the first time in weeks she was not feeling hungry. She instead pulled Donovan toward her, kissing him the moment his wonderful lips were in reach. Danielle’s hands went to his face to bring him even closer, dropping back down onto the bed with her husband now hovering over her. All she wanted to do was take part in their usual morning ritual and then hopefully go back to a peaceful, uninterrupted sleep. Donovan complied with her lips’ requests to deepen their kiss, and he slowly, carefully, gently lowered himself beside her, taking care to not rest entirely on the small swell of her stomach. His hand moved up her side and under her shirt, the cold of his hands making her shiver in a very good way. His palm grazed quickly over her barely noticeable bump before continuing its way upward, and Danielle sighed.

She would gladly stay up all night if it meant her mornings could start like this.

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“You’re a very good kisser!” Danielle announced, breaking away from Charlie Spinnet’s face. She had taken hold of his cheeks in her hands and now she was ogling his rather beautiful features. “You’re very cute, as well!”

“Thanks?” he laughed, pushing forward to kiss her again. Danielle shut her eyes again and reveled in the feeling, even though her heels were making it difficult to remain standing. The click of the tile reminded her that they were in the bathroom of the bar, and as drunk as she was, she was not going to shag anyone, let alone Charlie Spinnet, in the loo.

“Is your place---close?” she asked as his lips went to her neck. Danielle’s arm went out, her wristwatch stating that it was still before midnight and she would get approximately seven hours of sleep if they left right now.

“Er---yeah,” he said, sounding surprised. Why would he be surprised? Well, she supposed he had fancied her for years, finally being able to take her home and have his way with her was probably something he had not been expecting this evening.

It had been perfectly good timing, however; Danielle had run into Donovan earlier today at the hospital and it had gone exactly as she had expected. He basically hated her and never wanted to see her, and right! That was fine. She had anticipated that sort of meeting, coming back to England. Everything went according to the plan she had imagined on the long, lonely trip across the Atlantic.

Spotting Charlie Spinnet at the other end of the bar had been the perfect sort of spiteful act that Danielle had been looking for. Not that Donovan would ever know or probably even care, but he had always hated Charlie for how blatantly he would flirt with her in school. The idea of hurting Donovan like he had hurt her tonight did not feel as good as she had imagined it would, but she pressed through her convoluted thoughts and had dragged Charlie into the loo.

“Mm,” she let out, shutting her eyes as the pain from the earlier meeting began to overwhelm her again. “Let’s go, please?”

“Are--are you sure? I mean,” Charlie started, making Danielle’s eyes snap open. He was breathless, and looked almost as if he was regretting his words. His hands were on her waist and were probably the only reason why she wasn’t crumpled on the floor. “You’re rather pissed.”

“I’m not shagging you here,” Danielle stated bluntly, and she watched Charlie’s face go a deep red. She sighed, dropping her head back, “so if you want to shag, we have to go back to your place.”

“I didn’t think...you never really seemed the type to---” Charlie’s mouth shut at the sight of Danielle’s slitted eyes. She never really seemed the type? Who was he to tell her that she wasn’t allowed to drunkenly shag a cute bloke out of spite? She was allowed to make mistakes! She wasn’t the only one to make mistakes! Why couldn’t he just take her back to his flat and make her feel good? Feel something?

She wasn’t the type to go home with blokes she’d just met, but right now she wanted to be. She really, really wanted to be because dealing with the fact that Donovan Rookwood, the boy she had loved for so very long, hated every fiber of her being was far too difficult to stand. Danielle tried her best to keep her angry eyes set on Charlie, but his words rang true in her ears. She really wasn’t the type.

Her shoulders sagged and she pulled her arms away from his shoulders. Charlie looked ready to kick himself, but she was grateful he’d given her the out. Now that the feverish snogging had stopped, her mind cleared just enough to realize how much she would have regretted waking up in his bed tomorrow morning.

“You’re right,” she said with a sigh, leaning back on the sink. “I don’t want to shag you.”

“You really know how to ruin a guy’s ego,” Charlie said with a chuckle, running a nervous hand through his hair. He shrugged, and Danielle reached out and straightened his shirt with a quick tug. “Do you want me to walk you home at least?”

Danielle smiled and nodded, straightening up and allowing Charlie to open the door for her.

Well, at least she would still get her seven hours of sleep.

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Her son sat plumply on her lap, eyes wide with amazement and awe as he stared at the miniature planets that were floating in front of him. Danielle lazily held her wand upright as her attention was not on the correct orbits of the balls, but on Cole and his complete fascination with them. He seemed so alert and interested in the display that she could see the wheels turning in the rather young mind of his. She knew the accepted idea of how much a six month old could understand and process, but her son was the product of two very brilliant people. He surely must be appreciating the orbs for much more than their shiny glow.

“You could be an astronomer,” she said, patting down his hair with her free hand. “You could see the stars.” Cole looked up at her touch and smiled. Danielle dipped her head to kiss his nose and her baby twisted and wiggled to press his face into her chest, letting her wrap her arms around him.

Even after all these days, weeks, and months, Danielle still found herself still so overwhelmed by the unconditional love she felt for her son and the love she got back in return. Danielle was very logical and she had only loved one other person in her life. She supposed she should have known that a product of Donovan and herself would maintain the complete devotion she held for her husband, but it was a different feeling that she would never have been able to imagine. She was absorbed in Cole, his every movement and growth and his entire existence. When her son was happy and cooing, laughing and playing with her, Danielle was unable to contain her delight. When he was sad, sick, or crying without resolution, her entire body was racked with a pain she had never endured, and she never got used to the ache..

She had always marveled at how selfless other mothers had seemed to be with their children, but had never been able to understand it. Danielle was a logical creature and trying to understand the strength to not hesitate in giving your very last breath for a person was difficult. She'd only ever felt that sense of devotion to Donovan, so Danielle supposed that she should have known that a baby born from their love would give her these sort of feelings. Though it was a different kind of love. Danielle did not feel the deep desire to protect Donovan in every way, to be the one to mold and shape his life in a way that he’d never experience the hurt or pain that she had. Cole was not going to feel the pain of a parent’s betrayal like both his mother and father had. She had learned from their parents’ mistakes and was bound to the idea that Cole’s life would be wonderful and thrilling without any heartache.

Cole reached up and patted her chin, and Danielle dipped her head to kiss his. Danielle wasn’t naive; she knew that one day a girl will break her son’s heart, or he’d come across some other obstacle that he couldn’t get by. It was bound to happen, it happened to everyone no matter how hard they tried. But as she secured her hold on her son so she could stand, placing him on her shoulder to rest, Danielle silently promised to that she would always do anything and everything for her son.

“Let’s go see the stars,” she whispered.

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Her shoulders sagged, the beads of her dress rubbing harshly against her hands that rested on her lap. Danielle stared miserably down the street as she sat on the curb outside of the event hall, the light drizzle not causing her much concern. She had listened to her friends' advice and had attended the Ministry gala that was being held in honor of the fallen heroes of the now ended war. Her thought-process was that if she had to find a reason to leave her flat for something other than work, it should be to celebrate those that had laid down their lives to stop You-Know-Who's reign. It had seemed like a good idea and she may have even enjoyed herself if she had not immediately spotted Donovan Rookwood on the other side of the ballroom.

It was as if her eyes had managed the incredible ability to see through human bodies because it was simply a turn of her head and there he was, standing with a drink in his hand and smiling at a dark haired woman she didn't recognize. Danielle felt her chest seize with pain at the realization that it was her, the woman he was engaged to, and breathing became a complicated ordeal. Completely ignoring the fact that she had been listening in on the Healer in Chief's tales from the war, Danielle darted out of the ballroom and out of the building completely.

It had been more than three months since she'd spoken to Donovan, since he'd told her that he was currently engaged to be married. Married! To someone that wasn't her. The always present guilt sunk Danielle's heart deeper into her chest at the thought; if only she'd been braver, if only he'd responded to just one of her letters…life would be so different. It was so hard to think about---she was a professional woman, a healer who was held in high-esteem. She was one of the best in her field and all she could think about, the only thing in this very universe that defined her to herself was the fact that she'd lost the love of her life.

"You're going to ruin your dress," a familiar voice said from behind her. Danielle quickly turned to look back at Donovan, but she scowled and looked away again. His date would be following shortly, there was no doubt, and she had no desire to get a good look at the smug expression the woman's face was sure to have at the sight of Danielle looking so pathetic.

She kept her focus on the changing color of the muggle traffic lights, forcing herself to ignore the fact that he was still standing behind her. How slow was this girl? Donovan could not possibly tolerate a woman who kept him waiting!

The rain began to pound down from the sky, and Danielle winced as she readied herself to get soaked, but found that the rain had managed to avoid her. Startled, she turned her head up and saw that Donovan was holding an umbrella over her head.

"I'll get going," she said, though she made no effort to get up from her spot. Donovan dropped down beside her and Danielle twisted away, "You don't have to show me pity, I can handle the rain."

"Pity?"

"I'm sure your date won't appreciate you saving me from the rain," Danielle said, hoping that her words came out harshly, but knowing that she only managed to sound like a wounded, miserable soul. She felt Donovan's stare on her, a feeling that could knock her very logical mind off its track in a millisecond. The rain grew harder around them, and with the rolling thunder she almost didn't hear his next words.

"I didn't bring a date." Danielle's head shot toward him. Donovan was smiling at her, and she forced herself to keep her hands twisted together in her lap.

"I saw you talking to a woman with blue robes," Danielle said, trying to keep her heart from beating too fast. "She had brown hair---"

"That's Gabriel's wife," Donovan said with a light laugh. "She's one of my oldest friends. She's the one that spotted you leaving."

Danielle nodded; yes---that's right, now that she thought of it, it had been Rachel Corner. So---

"Why don't you have a date?" she dared to ask. Danielle had let her hopes go up with Donovan before, so she forced herself to tread carefully. The two were unbothered by the torrential rain pounding down around them; Danielle hardly heard it as she focused on his next words.

"I broke things off with Cecilia last night," he said. Her heart was in her throat. "I heard you'd be here---I wanted to tell you in person."

Danielle would have to thank Erin Kirke for being the busy-body that she was. She felt warm all over even if the rain was now soaking her feet as the puddles grew larger. He didn't have a date because he'd broken things off with the woman he had been betrothed to, and he'd come to the event simply to see her face to face. It all added up to one thing, but Danielle had been making very poor decisions as of late and could not trust her instincts.

"I wish I could say I was sorry," she said, earning a light laugh from him. Donovan shook his head. She knew that it must have been hard for him to break the engagement with how loyal he was to his family, but…he was always a man who did what he believed was right, and used his own mind to make his decisions. He needed to tell her, he needed to tell her exactly why he had ended things with the other woman, she needed to hear it.

They sat in silence for a few moments, Danielle not daring to say a word and Donovan seemingly mulling over his thoughts. She wanted to jump into his arms and ride off into the sunset, but she knew that things would take time. He was a gentleman through and through---he wouldn't risk embarrassing Cecilia by jumping into bed with another woman the day after he'd left.

Even if Danielle really, really wanted him to---

"Would you like to go on a date with me?" he asked suddenly. Danielle's eyes widened, surprised at the innocent nature of the question. A date. They had not been on a date since Hogsmeade. It was a beautiful, perfect way to rekindle what they had; slow, steady, as if starting fresh and new. A date.

"I would love to," she said, never having been surer of something in her life.

Donovan's smile could have lit up the dark and stormy night and after a few seconds of simply staring (Danielle's eyes were full of such adoration she may have seemed delirious), they both leaned close and sealed this prospect of a date with a kiss. The umbrella shut and dropped to the curb, letting the rain pour down on them. It silenced the rest of the world around them, nothing existed except for this kiss. Their hands greedily latched on to each other, his side, her face, it was not a kiss that was shared by two people before a first date; it felt like an acknowledgment that they were finally on their way back to what they'd strayed from for so long.

"I've missed you so much," she managed between kisses and breaths, and trying to not sputter on the rain. They held each other close, the rain cascading down his features and splashing onto hers. Donovan nodded and opened his mouth to seemingly respond, but instead he decided to close the distance and kiss her again. Danielle hummed happily into his mouth, satisfied with his decision.

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