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(the directions were to be as honest as you can be, talk about your struggles, and relate this to teenagers in the 60s. Then you had to compile a bunch of lyrics and songs to express all of the above) I will start off my paper by stating that I believe the human race would be nowhere without companionship. I say this because without motivation or determination to achieve a goal, no one would progress. By companionship, I mean a support system, with benefits. The word “benefits” is not necessarily to be perceived in a sexual sense. These benefits may include any or all of the following: emotional support (a shoulder to cry on), trust, “comedic therapy”, someone/thing to love, someone/thing who loves in return, someone/thing to provide motivation, etc. Some find companionship within others, some within inanimate objects (for instance, food) or pets, and some within themselves. I find that I am the type who relies within myself for support. I am my most trusted companion and friend. Some would consider me an “introvert”, some would consider me anti-social. This doesn’t bother me, mainly because I see no problem in being self-aware and I am far from anti-social. I’ve found that though I truly am the only person I feel comfortable relying on, doing so is not easy. Though self-awareness is extremely important and inspiring to me, I am still very involved with my friends and family. I have trouble being so self-absorbed in such a social lifestyle. This being said, I feel as if I put other people’s safety and enjoyment before mine. (This reminds me of the boy in the 1960’s movie we’re watching in class that sends his parents a letter from Vietnam saying Vietnam is nearly like a walk in the park). I want happiness for all that I feel deserve it and I try to do my best to be as reliable and encouraging as I can to those I love. This is simply because if someone is, let’s say, “special” enough to gain my trust and love, I feel they deserve the best. “A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.”-Jim Morrison. However, I do not like drawing attention to myself and I do not know how to handle myself if such affection is redirected my way by a loving friend. And yet I believe that my ideas and standpoints are the right ideas and standpoints. I feel like I should be instructing people, in many aspects of life; the way people live, what they believe in, how they do their hair and make-up, how they should conduct their daily rituals, and so on and so forth. However, I would never dare do such a thing, for my greatest fear is coming off as pretentious, and that is as honest I can be. I know that others feel this way. I know because people have told me firsthand. I am sure this type of mixed, chaotic, selfless-self-absorption was present in the sixties, for teens do not vary much. There are three types of teens: the type that cares and the type that doesn’t, and the type that finds themselves wandering somewhere in between. The latter is the most common. Now, to answer a few questions from the sheet provided, I would like to say that I value an open-mind, an honest soul, and the fact that I am seventeen and the paragraph above is one big honest mush of internal conflict that only exists within teenagers and schizophrenics (a.k.a.: Innocence and confusion in youth and finding happiness within my faux-insanity, which are things that are hard to appreciate right now, but things I know I will never forget, and miss dearly when they are gone). “I believe in a long, prolonged, derangement of the senses in order to obtain the unknown.” “I have the heart of a poet, and soul of a clown, which causes me to blow at the most important moments.” –JM. I also value people who inspire others, especially those who inspire me, most of which happen to be musical and/or visual artists. It’s this inspiration which makes the difference. It stimulates the mind and demands change. When I watch actors perform on stage, it inspires me. When I act and perform on stage, I hope it inspires others. When I hear a song that is so true to itself that I have to just stop and listen, I feel completely entranced and completely inspired. This inspiration causes me to want to better myself and surrounds and be positive. That is what I truly value: positively through peace of mind. This nirvana is achieved in one way and one way only for me: music. This is entirely and completely clique, but I do not care because it just adds to the simplistic-complextic honesty of my paper (I know complextic isn’t a real word). Simple variations of common guitar chords in correlation with synthesizers among other musical accompaniment have the power to take a person into a whole new dimension. My half-idealistic neo-hippie thought process is not borrowed from our overly intoxicated friends from the sixties. I can honestly say this is as true as I can be to myself on paper as possible and it is common fact that there are tons of others who feel this way; people who feel that music, nature, and simplicity hold a spiritual power that make a person feel simply free. This is the only thing that keeps me sane. There is but one flaw with this manner of thinking: Reality strikes. Not everyone is as kind and in touch as the peaceful thinkers of today. We live in a world of war, dirty politics, poverty, rape, and thievery. We also live in a world where it is more important to weigh 100 pounds and look like Paris Hilton than it is to vote. It is fact that more people tune in to vote for American Idol than vote in the presidential elections. The media pushes sex and glamour. The government pushes war and even religion. It would be nice to have the freedom to just do whatever you want, but that freedom is extremely hard to obtain. You need money to survive and you need a job for money. This totally like, harshes our grooves, man. Spirituality, connection with nature and surroundings, and peace of mind is difficult to maintain in such a demanding and negative environment. This is why the hippie culture did not last. Reality struck. They had no money, and no sense of the world around them. They wanted free love and peace throughout. When reality met their culture, disease struck, they ran out of food, they had no money, they couldn’t support their, what many would describe as reckless, lifestyles. This is why a person like me is so conflicted. All I want is eternal relaxation in such a harsh world. So many teens in the sixties wanted to change the harsh reality and stop the war, but they couldn’t. I am past the point of trying to make a difference. I can only hope to inspire, and keep the fire within others aflame, because that’s what really counts. You must find joy in life’s obscurities and the world’s flaws because if nothing is going to change, then stay hopeful, stay positive. There is so much more I could say, but it truly does just come down to just what I said. To get by in this world, you have to keep your chin up, do what you have to do, and then at the end of the day, come back to your companion. You come back to what keeps you going, then you keep on going, and hopefully along the way, you hear a few good tunes, make a few good friends, and have at least one meaningful epiphany. The following is composed of lyrics and quotes which express through poetry what I have just attempted to express in essay/journal form:
“Time wears away
All the pleasures of the day
All the treasures you could hold
Days turn to sand
Losing strength in every hand
They cant hold you anymore” -Beck, Already Dead "I am interested in anything about revolt, disorder, chaos, especially activity that seems to have no meaning. It seems to me to be the road toward freedom... Rather than starting inside, I start outside and reach the mental through the physical." -
-Jim Morrison “I've seen the end of the day come too soon
Not a lot to say, not a lot to do
You played the game, you owe nothing to yourself
Rest a day, for tomorrow you can't tell
You can't tell
I've seen the end of the day come too late
Seen the love you had turning into hate
Had to act like I didn't even care
But I did so I got stranded standing there
Standing there
It's nothing that I haven't seen before
But it still kills me like it did before
No it's nothing that I haven't seen before
But it still kills me like it did before
I've seen the end of the day come too soon
Like the prison dogs they set out after you
You owe nothing to the past but wasted time
To serve a sentence that was only in your mind
In your mind
It's nothing that I haven't seen before
But it still kills me like it did before
No it's nothing that I haven't seen before
But it still kills me like it did before”
-Beck, End of the Day “We don't have to worry
Life goes where it does
Faster than a bullet
From an empty gun
Turn yourself over
Loose change we could spend
Grinding down diamonds
Round, round, round the bend
People pushing harder
Up against themselves
Make their daggers sharper
Than their faces tell
Babe, its your time now
Loose change we could spend
Where we are going
Round, round, round the bend”
-Beck, Round the Bend “Put your hands on the wheel
Let the golden age begin
Let the window down
Feel the moonlight on your skin
Let the desert wind
Cool your aching head
Let the weight of the world
Drift away instead
These day I barely get by
I dont even try
Its a treacherous road
With a desolated view
Theres distant lights
But here theyre far and few
And the sun dont shine
Even when its day
You gotta drive all night
Just to feel like youre ok
These days I barely get by
I dont even try”
-Beck, The Golden Age “Every year is getting shorter
Never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to nought
Or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone
The song is over
Thought I'd something more to say
Home, home again
I like to be here when I can
When I come home cold and tired
It's good to warm my bones beside the fire
Far away across the field
The tolling of the iron bell
Calls the faithful to their knees
To hear the softly spoken magic spells”
-Pink Floyd, Time “Temptation's page flies out the door
You follow, find yourself at war
Watch waterfalls of pity roar
You feel to moan but unlike before
You discover
That you'd just be
One more person crying.
So don't fear if you hear
A foreign sound to your ear
It's alright, Ma, I'm only sighing.
As some warn victory, some downfall
Private reasons great or small
Can be seen in the eyes of those that call
To make all that should be killed to crawl
While others say don't hate nothing at all
Except hatred.
Disillusioned words like bullets bark
As human gods aim for their mark
Made everything from toy guns that spark
To flesh-colored Christs that glow in the dark
It's easy to see without looking too far
That not much
Is really sacred.
While preachers preach of evil fates
Teachers teach that knowledge waits
Can lead to hundred-dollar plates
Goodness hides behind its gates
But even the president of the United States
Sometimes must have
To stand naked.
An' though the rules of the road have been lodged
It's only people's games that you got to dodge
And it's alright, Ma, I can make it.
Advertising signs that con you
Into thinking you're the one
That can do what's never been done
That can win what's never been won
Meantime life outside goes on
All around you.
You lose yourself, you reappear
You suddenly find you got nothing to fear
Alone you stand with nobody near
When a trembling distant voice, unclear
Startles your sleeping ears to hear
That somebody thinks
They really found you.
A question in your nerves is lit
Yet you know there is no answer fit to satisfy
Insure you not to quit
To keep it in your mind and not forget
That it is not he or she or them or it
That you belong to.
Although the masters make the rules
For the wise men and the fools
I got nothing, Ma, to live up to.
For them that must obey authority
That they do not respect in any degree
Who despise their jobs, their destinies
Speak jealously of them that are free
Cultivate their flowers to be
Nothing more than something
They invest in.
While some on principles baptized
To strict party platform ties
Social clubs in drag disguise
Outsiders they can freely criticize
Tell nothing except who to idolize
And then say God bless him.
While one who sings with his tongue on fire
Gargles in the rat race choir
Bent out of shape from society's pliers
Cares not to come up any higher
But rather get you down in the hole
That he's in.
But I mean no harm nor put fault
On anyone that lives in a vault
But it's alright, Ma, if I can't please him.
Old lady judges watch people in pairs
Limited in sex, they dare
To push fake morals, insult and stare
While money doesn't talk, it swears
Obscenity, who really cares
Propaganda, all is phony.
While them that defend what they cannot see
With a killer's pride, security
It blows the minds most bitterly
For them that think death's honesty
Won't fall upon them naturally
Life sometimes
Must get lonely.
My eyes collide head-on with stuffed graveyards
False gods, I scuff
At pettiness which plays so rough
Walk upside-down inside handcuffs
Kick my legs to crash it off
Say okay, I have had enough
What else can you show me?
And if my thought-dreams could be seen
They'd probably put my head in a guillotine
But it's alright, Ma, it's life, and life only.”
-Bob Dylan, It’s Alright, Ma (I’m Only Bleeding) “Presenting modern moonlight just as advertised
Coke and Pepsi finally found a compromise
How can they complain that we’re all f----d up kids
When they keep on changing who our mother is?
Retinas are bleeding for the enterprise
Surgically wired into paradise
Yesterday I dropped in on the MKB
Everyone was messaging like it was going out of style
It was just the cynic in me
God, I love communicating!
I just hate the s--- we’re missing…
Everybody join in the magnificence!
Yes! Everything is absolutely making sense…
Every time you turn around your soul gets sold
to the highest bidder
Then they turn around and merger and they merger
and the merger and they murder and they murder
and the one who murders most will take it all……
Fight it all you want it’s useless
Night is in the way of progress
We’re gonna take your cities one by one
Cut your cables cut your cords and spoil all your fun
We’re gonna make your light a living hell
‘Cause stripped of your equipment you’ll be forced to face yourself…
Wire cutters of the world
You know what to use it for
Spread the word to all the tightrope walker boys and girls
Brace yourself for miracles
You’re in for a nasty shock
When the war is over you can read the paper” -The Dresden Dolls, Modern Moonlight “Loose lips might sink ships but loose gooses take trips
To san francisco, double dutch disco,
Tech tv hottie, do it for Scotty
Do it for the living and do it for the dead
Do it for the monsters under your bed
Do it for the teenagers and do it for your mom
Broken hearts hurt but they make us strong and
We won't stop until somebody calls the cops
and even then we'll start again and just pretend that
nothing ever happened
We won't stop until somebody calls the cops
and even then we'll start again and just pretend that
nothing ever happened
We're just dancing, we're just hugging,
singing, screaming, kissing, tugging
on the sleeve of how it used to be
How's it gonna be?
I'll drop kick Russell Stover, move into the starting over house
And know matt rouse and jest are watching me achieve my dreams
and we'll pray, all damn day, every day,
that all this s--- our president has got us in will go away
While we strive to figure out a way we can survive
these trying times without losing our minds
So if you wanna burn yourself remember that I LOVE YOU
And if you wanna cut yourself remember that I LOVE YOU
And if you wanna kill yourself remember that I LOVE YOU
Call me up before your dead, we can make some plans instead
Send me an IM, I'll be your friend
Shysters live from scheme to scheme and my 4th quarter pipe dreams
Are seeming more and more worth fighting for
So I'll curate some situations, make my job a big vacation
and I'll say F--- BUSH AND F--- THIS WAR
My war paint is sharpie ink and I'll show you how much my s--- stinks and ask you what you think because your thoughts and words are powerful
They think we're disposable, well both my thumbs opposable
Are spelled out on a double word and triple letter score
We won't stop until somebody calls the cops
and even then we'll start again and just pretend that
nothing ever happened
We won't stop until somebody calls the cops
and even then we'll start again and just pretend that
nothing ever happened
We're just dancing, we're just hugging,
singing, screaming, kissing, tugging
on the sleeve of how it used to be”
-Kimya Dawson, Loose Lips This last song by Kimya Dawson is probably my favorite in correlation to this paper because it captures the innocent fire of a teenager. All the lyrics provided above are from songs I listen to. I, as a self-proclaimed quirky yet intelligent young lady, find all these songs to be a perfect overall reflection of how I feel about my environment. I’m sure the teens of the sixties would find some similarities between us. Also, note that this is not all I think about, nor does any teen. Fun and entertainment is a huge slice of pie on the pie chart of a teenager’s life, but let’s not waste another nine pages.
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