Blue Ridge School of Witchcraft and Wizardry


October 6th, 2011

(no subject) @ 12:19 am

[info]ojandtostitos:

Characters: Tatum and, much to her dismay, Mack.
Setting: Outside of University house, Wednesday afternoon.
Content: SFW.
Summary: Tatum is on death's door with a head cold and in no mood for Mackenzie. So naturally, she appears.


Tatum was fairly sure that if any germs came within a few square miles of her, she would probably catch them. It wasn't really an ideal trait for someone who planned to work in a hospital one day, but there was really no helping it. When the weather cooled off, even if it was only a bit, she usually caught a cold. She was more prone to the flu when she visited Maine, but there was always something going around.

On this particular day, which she had opted out of classes on, she was feeling particularly terrible. Since the night before, her head was sore, her nose was stuffed, her throat was sore and she was pretty sure that the hot flashes were going to drive her insane. One moment she was freezing, sweating the very next. She couldn't seem to get comfortable, but had spent the majority of her day wrapped up in a blanket and playing PSP, nursing a glass of Nesquik of all things. She didn't know what it was about it, but she had always drank the stuff whenever she was sick, even as a kid. Unless she was getting sick, in which case milk was never a go-to option. It made her shudder to think about.

Becoming bored was a problem though, and between gaming and napping, she hadn't really done much of anything or even left her bed. She felt achey and tired, but dragged herself to her desk and flopped down. She supposed she could take it outside, get a little fresh air. Taking just a bit longer than usual, she rolled a little joint, sniffling as she tucked it behind her ear and let her hair fall over it. Blanket still wrapped around her shoulders, she shuffled to the door and into the hall, down the steps and outside. It looked fairly deserted, and that was just what she wanted to see. Wrapping her blanket tighter to keep it from dragging on the ground, the redhead made her way over toward the side of the building, coughing dryly the whole way before she had even lit up.

Finding a good rock to perch on for a few minutes, Tatum gave another pathetic sniffle before slipping the joint between her lips and lighting it. Exhaling through her mouth, no chance of exhaling through her nose, she closed her eyes and shivered inside of the blanket.
 
 |   |  Add to Memories  |  Tell a Friend  |   |   | 

Comments

 
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 7th, 2011 02:11 am (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie was walking back from class, nursing a sprained wrist when she saw her. She had been feeling a bit off ever since kissing Tatum in the apple orchard, and her injury could only attest to that. It had been a stupid mistake really, she had been spacing out during a training exercise and had failed to move quickly enough. Their professor had heeled it it up, but even when charmed with magic the body still remembered trauma.

After getting a particularly angry and long lecture on her poor performance in class the last couple of days, her teacher had all but kicked her out for the rest of the session. She couldn't even argue with the decision, she could have been killed because of her lack of attention. It still put her in a bad mood though to know that she was coming up short in an area she usually excelled at. Plus, on top of the whirlwind of emotions she had been feeling the last few days, it was turning out to be a horrible week.

Things could only get worse when she did spy the redhead sitting on the rock outside of University house. She had been mostly avoiding the girl, knowing that her anger would get the better of her and just make things worse. Yet, here she was, delivered right in front of Mackenzie. The blonde girl noted that she was looking a bit under the weather and felt her heart twinge painfully. She wanted so badly to take care of the girl, but she was still upset about the way she was being jerked around. Mackenzie didn't have the emotional range to deal with this kind of complex situation, so instead she frowned with a scowl fixed firmly on her face.

"Well if it isn't the extremely heterosexual Tatum," she drawled, feeling instantly guilty as she jabbed at the younger girl. She couldn't be nice though, Tatum had confused her too much and her natural defenses just wouldn't let her past. "Skipping class?"
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 8th, 2011 07:15 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Tatum's eyes had still been closed as Mackenzie approached, and she didn't open them until the blonde girl spoke. Opening just one, slowly at first, she suppressed the urge to let out a loud groan. This was just the sort of thing that she didn't want to be dealing with. She was far too exhausted and achey for bickering and silliness. Hitting the joint again, she exhaled and looked away moodily.

"Well if it isn't the extremely arrogant Mack," she muttered back, sighing. "Sick," she added simply in response to the question. "N-Not that it's any of your business," she went on, reaching in side of the blanket with her free hand and producing the waterbottle she had mixed her Nesquik up in, lifting it to her lips. Her throat was getting way too dry. "What d-do you even want?"

She thought to offer the joint to the older girl, since she was around now and all, but hesitated for a second before she actually did it. Puff puff pass was more about the principle, not affection. Weed was just about spreading the love.. well, maybe not love, she decided with a little flip of her stomach.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 10th, 2011 04:06 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie frowned at the shorter girl's reply, not liking the way it stung when Tatum told her that it was none of her business. She wanted to tell the girl that she wanted it to be her business, that she would love it if the redhead would let it be her business. Mackenzie wasn't the type of girl to take care of anyone besides maybe Hunter, but once again, the redhead seemed to be bringing out a side of her that she never knew existed. It made her stomach twist and she quickly, decided to think about something else.

"I was just walking back from class," she answered, shrugging. "Got kicked out, but I suppose that's none of your business." She smirked as she threw the girl's words back in her face, inside she had the same guilty feeling she had earlier. Now that she was here she really wasn't sure what to do, she really hadn't had a plan formulated.

She hesitated as the joint was offered to her, accepting the offering was like agreeing to play whatever game Tatum was currently torturing her with. Mackenzie couldn't tell what the other girl's intentions were, and that frustrated the tall blonde even more. "No thanks," she said, her arms still crossed. She was just going to leave it at that, but something inside her couldn't stop what she was about to continue with. "I wouldn't want to infect you with my gay germs anymore the I already have."

It wasn't fair, and it was an extremely low blow, but this was starting to become a breaking point for the blonde. She was sick and tired of everything at the moment, and all the stress was beginning to break her down. She wanted to instantly take it back, but instead she stood her ground, challenging Tatum to strike back with the best she could.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 11th, 2011 12:08 am (UTC)
(Link)
"Guess not," Tatum shrugged back, trying not to admit to herself that having the words turned around did bug her a little. Who did this girl think she was? Always acting so cocky and crass. Tatum frowned slightly, especially when the other girl turned down the joint. She pulled it back quickly, hitting it and exhaling out of one side of her mouth, giving the blonde a moody look.

She knew the other girl wouldn't just leave it alone, and she scoffed loudly at the blonde's comment. "Did your m-mother drop you on your head? I would think that a gay person, of all people, would know that gay people don't have germs. That has absolutely nothing to do with it, and I never said that," she muttered back, shaking her head and puffing a second time.

"G-Grow the fuck up," she added quietly.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 11th, 2011 04:58 pm (UTC)
(Link)
"Well you sure as hell act like I do," Mackenzie shot back, glowering at the shorter girl. It only pissed her off more when Tatum told her to grow up, and the taller girl was certain that she was seeing red. It was like parent weekend breakfast with her sister and Hunter all over again, she felt all of her self control fly out the window.

"Fucking really, Tatum? I need to grow the fuck up?" She seethed, her hands clenching into fists at her sides. Her face was turning red and she was sure that if it had been anyone else but the redhead, she probably would have punched them by now. "How about you take your own fucking advice, huh? I mean, Jesus, at least I'm not assaulting people after I kiss them. You really know how to fuck with someone's head, you know that?"

"If you're so fucking straight, then why do you keep messing with me like this?" She hissed, her hands clenching tighter. She was on a roll now, and once she started she couldn't stop, it was like a horrible car crash that you couldn't stop watching. It didn't matter that Tatum had told her to stay away, didn't the redhead know that was practically impossible for the blonde girl? She thought back to what Sera had said at the apple orchard, about how she had been interested in girl's plenty of times but still stuck around to take the red headed girl's abuse.

If she thought logically, it would only make sense that Sera was right, there was never really a time that she was wrong. Mackenzie felt her stomach turn unpleasantly again, and she made a disgusted face. It couldn't be true, there was no way in hell that she was in love with Tatum. She didn't fall in love, it wasn't the reason she was so off this week and it definitely wasn't the reason why she was so hurt by the redhead. She was only pissed off because the girl was being ridiculous, that had to be the only reason.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 11th, 2011 09:20 pm (UTC)
(Link)
"F-Fuck you," Tatum snapped back automatically, her eyes narrowing at the older girl standing in front of her. She held the joint, hung loosely from her lips, and her expression quickly dissolved from anger into slight hurt as she listened to what the blonde practically shouted at her. She still felt like shit physically, and she was in no mood to have Mack drag her down emotionally on top of that. She had been emotional enough over the last few days since the orchard.

It hurt her to realize how fucked up she had made the older girl feel, even if it had been an accident. Well, sort of an accident. In the end, Mack didn't know anything though, and she was in no position to be talking to her this way. Particularly when she was already feeling miserable. It didn't take long at all for her to have had enough.

"No, y-you are the fucking one messing w-with me! With your.. y-your stupid hair and your lips and y-your fucking legs!" the redhead practically spat, pushing herself up unsteadily from the rock she had been sitting upon. She stood in front of Mack, staring up at her from several inches below. "Y-You don't know me, and you don't k-know what I've done, or w-what I've been through, okay? Just stay the f-fuck away from me! You're going to just.. j-just be better off if you do, so go!"

Turning on her heel, the redhead pulled her blanket tighter around her shoulders before moving to stalk off.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 12th, 2011 05:27 am (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie was a bit surprised with the words that Tatum spat back at her, she had never seen the redhead so angry. As the smaller girl stood in front of her, wrapped in her blanket and looking particularly pale, Mackenzie couldn't help but feel the anger she was channeling falter. The girl's words didn't help fuel her anger at all either, if anything it left the blonde more confused than before. Tatum's comments on her hair, lips and legs left her feeling like she had just plummeted down the first hill of a roller coaster, and she was waiting for her stomach to catch up. What exactly did she mean by that? Before she could ask or protest though, the girl was gathering up her blanket to leave, and the blonde was once again torn between letting the girl run away again and stopping her.

"Oh hell no!" She grabbed the back of the girl's blanket, hoping to effectively stop her. She, like Hunter, didn't know when to stop, didn't know when to leave a situation alone. She had to keep poking at it until it exploded in her face. "I have done nothing to fuck with you! Sure, maybe I push your buttons a little too much, but I'm actually nice to you most of the time."

She let go of the girl's blanket, throwing her hands angrily in the air. Whatever flicker of sympathy and regret she had gotten from Tatum's words earlier was gone again. It was the same deadly cycle, confusion lead to anger, and her anger only caused her more confusion. "Maybe I want to fucking know you, did you ever think of that?" She yelled, raking her hands through her hair, aggravated.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 12th, 2011 04:25 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Though she winced when her blanket was grabbed, the younger girl did come to a slow stop. Why couldn't Mack just drop it already? She was only going to get hurt, she was clearly already hurt and that was proof enough. No matter how Tatum factored it, things would not turn out, they would not begin to look up.

Even if she wanted to just turn around and kiss the blonde, which she admittedly sort of did, that couldn't happen. She wasn't even sure she was capable of changing the lie of a life she had created for herself. She made her bed, and she would lie in it.

Giving a bitter laugh, the redhead finally did turn around once Mackenzie let her go, and she stared at the other girl with an expression she hoped was blank. There was a definite twinge of sympathy lurking under the surface. "Y-You don't want to know me. You think t-that you wanna know me, but y-you don't know the half of it. You're v-very nice, and that's w-worse," she muttered sullenly, looking away a bit.

"The last g-girl who knew me isn't even a-around anymore, okay? She was f-fucked up and I fucked her up m-more and now she's f-fucking gone and it's a lot of b-bullshit, okay? You d-dont even know.." she went on quietly, sniffling a bit against her stuffed nose. Just thinking about Frankie was making her tear up again too, just when she had been getting to a point in her life when she thought she could talk about her without getting choked up.

She was revealing more than she wanted, but it felt like she couldn't just stop. Mack obviously wasn't going to leave her alone easily, running off wouldn't solve it. Lifting a hand, she used the back of it to wipe her eyes, sulking deeper into her blanket. "E-Even if I wanted to, I can't d-do this with you, I just f-fucking can't do this again so you should just s-stop trying to be nice to me or f-fuck me or whatever you're doing. I'm not e-even me anymore, it doesn't matter what I-I want, don't you get that? I'm so ingrained to this.. t-this good Christian self-restraint, I c-can't even get out."

It felt good to say it, to come so close to implying the truth, but it scared her at the same time. Mack had every ability, and a right mind, to run right to Sera with this whole outburst. But she was still standing there. "I just-- if t-things were different, I'd.. I'd be different, okay? But I have t-to do what I have to do and y-you need another girl to chase," she suggested weakly, telling herself that saying that didn't leave her with a pang of jealousy.

Who would chase her if Mack didn't? Some boy? How awesome. She loved to hate the older girl, and as much as she screamed at her to go away, she knew a part of her would ache on the day when the blonde would grow ears and finally listen and just leave her behind. Then she'd have killed one girl and driven the other out of her life just as completely. She wanted to cry even harder at the thought.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 12th, 2011 05:38 pm (UTC)
(Link)
When Tatum turned to face her, Mackenzie once again felt herself falter. She would have preferred it if the girl had been screaming at her. Instead she was talking so quietly that Mackenzie could barely hear her, but the words still reached the blonde's ears. Her heart was breaking as Tatum spoke, and she was positive that she had never felt so much pain. This was why the girl always seemed so unhappy, the reason that Tatum rarely smiled. She didn't know the full story about the girl that the girl referred to, but she could guess that whatever had happened had been bad.

Mackenzie wasn't aware of the tears until she felt the cold trail left by one sliding down her cheek. She had always figured that Tatum was hiding in the closet, but she had never guessed that the girl had so much pain. It had showed itself in little bits and piece, Mack always knew there was a sadness about the girl. This, however, was a whole new level. Now she was cry for the smaller girl, she couldn't even remember the last time she had cried. Mackenzie Dubinsky never cried.

"I don't want another girl to chase," she admitted hoarsely, wiping her face with her sleeve quickly. Her shoulders were sagging now, and it looked as if she might fold into herself. She wasn't sure what to do with all of these new emotions, but it killed her that she couldn't do anything for the other girl. "I want you."

She smiled weakly at the other girl, and reached out a timid hand to squeeze the other girl's shoulder in comfort. Mackenzie wanted to hug the girl badly, to pull her blanket and all into her arms and let her cry into her shoulder. She couldn't make herself do it though, it was too much emotion for her at the moment. She doubted that Tatum would let her get that close anyway, the other girl would probably call her a rapist.

"You deserve to be happy," she whispered, looking away for a moment before looking the girl in the eyes. She was frozen once she made eye contact, lost in the other girl's eyes. She could feel something strange in her chest, her heart seemed like it was trying to explode. "Look me in the eye and tell me you don't want this too. Look me in the eye and mean it Tatum, because I won't leave you alone until you actually do."
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 13th, 2011 08:01 am (UTC)
(Link)
Thankful for the small silence that settled in, mostly because it meant she wouldn't have to talk about Frankie anymore if they just stayed quiet, she watched the older girl out of the corner of her eye. She was genuinely surprised to see a tear slipping down the blonde's cheek, she hadn't been sure she was capable. She was less surprised when Mack was quick to wipe it away and try to act tough again.

"Y-You don't, I told you," the redhead reminded her gently, without any smugness or cruelty to her tone. She just looked worn out, staring at the trees around them instead of the other girl in front of her. "I-I know I sound like.. some bad cliche movie q-quote about the wrong side of the t-tracks, but I am so wrong s-side for you. I'm bad news, okay?" she informed her, trailing off.

"If you h-hang around me, you'll start c-crying like a bitch like this a-all the time," she half-joked, kicking the grass absently with the toe of her sneaker. "My m-mom says I started crying a-at twelve and just n-never stopped. She hates i-it."

She swallowed thickly, still trying to avoid making actual eye contact with the blonde. That would have made it so much harder. She tried her best, but her restraint was slipping, the orchard had shown that. It was why she needed to get with Sam, and quick. Someone else, anyone else, to think about and focus on instead of driving herself crazy with this situation between her and the tall blonde beside her. When Mack touched her shoulder, squeezing it, she glanced at the other girl for a moment. She weakly smiled back before turning away again.

"In order for m-me to be happy, a lot of other people would.. b-be really unhappy. M-My whole family maybe," she murmured. "I can't do that," she added weakly, her eyes meeting Mack's as the blonde stared at her. She felt slightly rigid, a little panicked at the depth of things she might reveal just with her eyes, but she didn't break the contact. "I w-want a lot of.. things, a lot of p-people, I w-wanted someone.. s-something two y-years ago, but I'm not t-that selfish. What I want.. and what I h-have to do, who I have to be, are s-so fucking different."

Turning away finally, she pulled the blanket up tighter around herself, as if she could drown everything out. "I w-want my dad to be proud of m-me.. that's what I-I want. And I-I wish my best f-friend wasn't d-d-dead," she whispered, practically choking out the last word even though the reality had set in a long time ago now. "Who c-cares what I want? Wishing d-doesn't work."
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 14th, 2011 03:32 am (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie watched with a grief stricken expression as Tatum came unraveled in front of her. This hadn't been what she was expecting to hear at all. Sure, she knew that Tatum was pretty much living in the closet at this point, but she never knew how the girl actually felt about it. She saw so much pain in the younger girl's eyes, saw a girl who just wanted to be who she wanted but couldn't. The blonde could feel the tears pricking at her eyes again, but this time she made no attempt to wipe them away.

She almost missed what Tatum said when she turned around, and her eyes grew big when she did catch what the younger girl barely whispered. It was at this point that the blonde girl realized that Tatum had been right all along, she really didn't know the girl at all. She wanted to wrap her arms around the girl and tell her that everything would be alright. They wouldn't be though, not right away anyway. She didn't hesitate in stepping forward however and wrapping her arms around the smaller girl's waist.

The taller girl had to bend over a bit as she rested her chin on Tatum's shoulder. She pulled the smaller girl, blanket and all, close to her and closed her eyes. Tatum's scent invaded her senses, and for a moment she was silent. "Fuck 'em," she said finally, squeezing Tatum lightly. "Fuck all of them T, because you shouldn't live for anyone but yourself."

It was crossing a line, she knew that, especially after the events of the apple orchard, but she nuzzled into the crook of Tatum's neck anyway. It was purely for comfort and that scared the taller blonde slightly. She genuinely wasn't trying to do anything but make the girl feel less alone.

"I'm so sorry Tatum," She whispered into the girl's neck. "It's not your fault, okay? You don't deserve to feel this way, you don't deserve to be scared of who you are or what you want. You shouldn't feel guilty for feeling the way you do, because there's nothing wrong with who you want to be. If your dad can't be proud of who you are, then he doesn't deserve someone as amazing as you. I know it's hard, but you can do it, you can be who you want T. I know you can."
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 19th, 2011 08:17 am (UTC)
(Link)
It was a surprisingly easy fight to win to keep herself still and calm as Mackenzie's arms wrapped around her. She hated to admit it, but she felt like shit and being held was one of the only sure fire cures she knew of. Even if it was with Mack, even if it was making her heart pound desperately in her chest. She didn't fight it, just staying wrapped in her blanket and the blonde's arms, staring straight ahead and sniffling as she spoke to her.

"Don't you t-think I'd say that if it was that e-easy?" she whispered hoarsely, resisting the urge to lean her head against Mack's as the blonde's chin sat on the crook of her neck. "I could just.. just go say fuck it tomorrow. I d-don't want to, that's the point, I can't.. i-it's my daddy, you know? I can't just f-fuck up."

She sniffled again, quite shakily. She felt she might break down, but she wanted to hold it together. The situation was awkward enough, the details and fears and desires she was just blurting out as if someone had dosed her with veritaserum. She didn't need to start wailing like a banshee on top of that. "I w-wanna live for me but that's not.. like, I don't know if y-you get it. Do you e-even like your parents? I can't just-- t-they raised me, even.. even if t-they suck."

Turning her head in just a bit, so her cheek was pressed against Mack's, she sighed heavily. "I'm n-never gunna be good enough and o-on top of that, I'm a g-great big f-fucking fag," she blurted quietly, biting down harshly on her lip. There it was, then. Mack was now free to run off and tell everyone, even Sera, especially Sera. She waited anxiously, expecting for the blonde to pull away from her with an obnoxious laugh or something. Maybe Sera even sent her here, maybe it was all a game to get her to just admit it, after all their months of torture. Maybe Hunter was in the bushes with a camera.

"I g-gotta go," the redhead quickly added before Mack could actually reply, squirming a bit in the blonde's embrace.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 19th, 2011 09:39 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie had been about to protest against what Tatum was saying once again when she felt the girl turn her head. Suddenly she felt the warmth of the redhead's cheek against her own. Nothing had ever felt so right to the blonde girl, it felt like she was finally home. The redhead's words once again jarred Mackenzie from the feeling of comfort however. She was surprised, not because Tatum had told her she was gay, but because the girl had actually admitted it out loud.

Giving the girl a small squeeze to reassure her, she turned her head slightly to brush a small kiss on the girl's cheek. It was probably the simplest gesture of her feelings that the blonde had ever made. There was no lies or deception behind it, no grand scheme or plan. It was just simply a kiss, a little expression of her care for the younger girl. "Your secret is safe with me," She said quietly, nuzzling the younger girl again.

When the girl started squirming in her arms, she released her without any protest. She figured that she owed Tatum her space after what had just happened between them. She turned the girl to face her first however, she wanted to try to give the girl something in return for her opening up to the blonde. It was only fair that Mackenzie make herself vulnerable too. It terrified the older girl that she was even thinking that way, but it was too late to close herself back up now.

"I do like my parents," she blurted out awkwardly, trying to be brave and not break her eye contact. "I...I just wish they'd like me more. They hate me I'm pretty sure, so, I guess that answer's your question." It really had no context, but the blonde felt better after letting it out. She continued to hold Tatum by the shoulders so the younger girl wouldn't get away. "I only pretend to hate them because it's easier than feeling like they don't care. I...I know how it feels to not be good enough, it's not easy. My mom isn't exactly happy that I'm gay either, just so you know. If it helps."

She stood there awkwardly, letting out a nervous laugh. She dropped her arms from the younger girl's shoulders and ran her hands through her hair. She knew what she wanted to ask, and she knew that the girl would probably say no. She figured she might as well ask anyway, because what did she really have to lose at this point? It was like being at rock bottom with the girl all the time anyway.

"I...don't usually ask things like this," she mumbled, looking towards the ground. "I figure you won't want to, but uh...maybe...would you go to homecoming with me?"
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 20th, 2011 08:07 am (UTC)
(Link)
Tatum half way couldn't believe it as she felt the blonde's lips on her cheek, couldn't believe that she was letting it happen, fighting off her panic. Anyone from the university who decided to sneak out for a smoke, as they had, was apt to stumble upon the scene. Tatum wrapped in her blanket, Mackenzie wrapped around the outside of that. She was truly in shock, slightly skeptical shock, when Mack promised to keep her secret. How long would that last? Sera was persistent. Hunter was worse.

"F-Forget I said anything, no secret to keep!" she insisted loudly none the less, breaking free as soon as Mack's arms let her go. She tried to take a few paces away, needing the distance between them before she did something stupid like fall back into her arms again. But then the older girl was turning her back, and she went easily. She was glad to at least have her hair in her face now to hide behind a bit, peering out and meeting Mack's eyes from under it as the blonde spoke.

She was surprised by Mack's admission, even more moreso by the immediate kinship it made her feel for the tall girl. They had a lot more in common than Tatum had wanted to admit, always sort of had, but she had still always just been that show-off jock asshole. Talking about their parents though, both baring fragile parts of themselves that they rarely spoke about, almost made the redhead reconsider. "P-Parents suck sometimes I-I guess.. Not a lot of t-them are s-supportive. T-They're just as selfish as kids," she muttered weakly. "I see all t-these gay people on tv and it a-all works out and everybody l-loves them and that's great but t-that's not my life."

Trailing off for a moment, she tried to look at Mack's forehead instead of making actual eye contact. It made the anxiety lift slightly. "If it was a movie, I-I'd get Diora Baird to p-play me. I wouldn't be s-some gawky f-fucking loser," she muttered. She was a bit relieved when she was let go, but she quickly felt her stomach sinking as Mack went on. The look on her face, the awkward tone, the way she looked down, Tatum had seen it before. Boys looked the same way before they asked you out. When Mack did, the redhead's stomach clenched painfully and her lips twitched into a little frown.

The word 'yes' was already trying to roll off her tongue, when had any boy ever exposed his emotions to her like this stupid girl kept doing, but she fought it. There was just no way. Her parents would expect photographs, people would talk, word would get around. There was really no point in all of her years of denial and hiding if she showed up at the first dance of the year on Mack's arm instead of Sam's. The same Sam who was so safe, didn't pressure her, didn't try to pry every little secret out of her. That was what she needed.

"N-No, sorry," she replied, a bit more curtly than she had meant to, just looking down at her sneakers. It was so much easier than looking at Mack. It was sort of breaking her heart to do this, but it wasn't the first time she had broken her own heart for the sake of her family. "I-I'm like, g-good actually? I might.. I m-might not even go. If I don't.. h-have a boyfriend. Before t-then."

She supposed Mack knew all about Colin, most everyone else did now. Sera had seen to that. Tatum had given up the Colin charade ages ago now, but Sam was easily filling the void. Plus he was nicer and more handsome than Colin, even if the handsomeness was sort of wasted on her.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 20th, 2011 11:59 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie scoffed and rolled her eyes, "You're way hotter than Diora Baird." She blushed slightly as the words left her mouth, she hadn't meant to be that forward. "I think you're beautiful," she offered quietly as an after thought. It was the honest truth, as sappy as it was. Mack knew that Hunter would make fun of her for saying so, but she couldn't help it. She would tell the younger girl ever time that she was, no matter how much the other girl protested against it.

She waited with baited breath in the small silence that fell between them. The blonde really didn't want to get her hopes up, she had trained herself over the year to expect nothing. She hoped that maybe Tatum would surprise her, she had already shocked the blonde by coming out to her. Even if she had denied it a second later when she had promised not to tell anyone. It still made the taller girl slightly hopeful, perhaps Tatum might say yes. The redhead looked as if she really wanted to, but perhaps it was in Mackenzie's imagination.

When Tatum said no, Mackenzie tried to ignore the way her heart dropped into her stomach. She didn't know why she thought that the redhead would even consider saying yes. It hurt a lot more than she had imagined it would, and tried to keep the hurt from showing.

"Oh, that's cool," she said quietly. The blonde bit her lip, trying to think of something to say to cover up how she felt. "It's pretty lame anyway, I didn't really wanna go. Probably just going to go find some party to crash. Homecoming is for losers like Hunter and Michi who are all married and shit." She frowned, a small scowl on her face. She really hoped her tall friend would leave well enough alone and not pressure her to go.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 23rd, 2011 01:51 pm (UTC)
(Link)
"Nobody is hotter than Diora Baird," Tatum muttered back sullenly. When Mack called her beautiful, she quickly adverted her eyes and coughing gently, tried to hope that her cheeks weren't as pink as they felt. This was ridiculous, why was she standing here still? Why had she said that to her? Of all the people she could have just blurted the truth to, it had to be Mack.

She had started this whole mess, when she should have just walked away. Now she was standing around realizing that Mackenzie Dubinsky really did seem to think she was gorgeous, and she still couldn't understand why. Or deny the way it made her palms sweat and her heart race a bit.

Trying to ignore the quick flash of disappoint on the older girl's face, Tatum bit her own lip as well, eyes focusing on the ground as they always did in moments of awkwardness. This had gone from awkward to worse in no time. "Yeah, lame as fuck," the younger girl agreed weakly. "I wouldn't.. like, i-if my mom didn't expect me to, I wouldn't g-go. I hate that s-shit, it's like.. all those people, I feel like my h-head is going to explode. Everybody s-staring and squished in that little like, room. I just uhm.. y'know, to keep mom happy. And d-dad, too."

She trailed off a bit as Mack mentioned Hunter, shrugging her shoulders. "Stupid l-losers, yeah."
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 24th, 2011 05:56 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Mackenzie scoffed at Tatum's excuses for why she had to attend homecoming. She was sure at another time in her life that her own mother would be trying to pressure her into doing the same thing, not that Mack had ever followed what her mother said. She was pretty sure that ever year she had gone with a different girl and sent back pictures just to get a rise out of Kate. Then there had been the year that she had gone with Hunter to really piss her mother off. That had been the end of Kate even feigning interest in if Mackenzie went to a school social function or not.

"As long as good 'ol mom and dad are happy, right?" She said a little more bitterly than she had intended. She frowned as though she had just eaten something particularly sour. What had been a bad mood at the start of the day had turned into an extremely bad mood now that she had gotten rejected. "Well I guess have a blast with Sam the man then, make sure to take lots of great pictures and stuff."

She turned to leave, debating whether she wanted to go to Hunter's room or just her own. While she wanted to go to Hunter and analyze what had just happened, she had promised not to tell anyone about Tatum coming out to her. It was a promise that she intended to keep, even if she was feeling a bit sore towards the redhead. It wasn't her place to go around outing the school's biggest closet case. She decided to just go mope in her own dorm room, probably break into some of her secret booze stash and smoke a few packs of cigarettes while she contemplated her next move.

Looking back over her shoulder, she gave the shorter girl a sad smile. "Feel better T," she said quietly, before starting to walk towards University house.
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]ojandtostitos
Date: October 24th, 2011 09:47 pm (UTC)
(Link)
"Right," Tatum agreed, rather bitterly herself. She chewed absently on her lower lip, still ever avoiding the eye contact. It made her feel like she could pretend she was somewhere else easier. It wouldn't last forever. Eventually Mack would get tired of her shit and move on, and that was probably the best thing for both of them. Even if it stung her to think of it. She would miss the way the blonde got at her for sure, even if she got mad at the other girl every time. It was just their way, but she knew the older girl could only take so much. She was just human, despite how she tried to act like an invincible hero.

"I will.. t-they'll expect loads, don't worry. It's the s-same every time. Worse now that they k-know I have a new boyfriend.. s-sort of. M-Maybe boyfriend, I d-don't know- I think he likes me, I h-hope," she murmured back, frowning and pulling her blanket tighter around her body as Mack turned away from her. "You d-don't have to be mad, it's.. just a dumb dance," she added.

When Mack glanced back, their eyes meeting for a moment as the blonde gave her a sad smile, Tatum felt herself go from defensive to sympathetic in a moment. "Yeah," she sighed back, "I-I'll try."
[User Picture Icon]
From:[info]thedirtysouth
Date: October 30th, 2011 07:17 pm (UTC)
(Link)
"Yeah, just a dumb dance," she muttered, mostly to herself. It was just a stupid dance, Mack had even thought so before. This really wasn't about the dance though, this was about Tatum. Mackenzie was pretty sure that she didn't care if they went to the dance or not. She just wanted to mean something to the redhead. She didn't just want to be that annoying second year girl who always flirted with her.

Turning away from the redhead again, Mackenzie retreated towards the university house as fast as she could manage without looking like she was running away. She knew that she should probably give up. Tatum would never change, and Mackenzie didn't want to be the one waiting around for the younger girl to finally make up her mind. Some people never let themselves become who they wanted to be, they just lived their lives suppressing their feelings. What if that was what Tatum was going to do? Mackenzie wasn't used to the feeling of not getting what she wanted. She wasn't used to the heartache and disappointment. She hated it, she wanted it to be over.

Shuffling up the stairs to her room, she let herself in and immediately flopped face down on her bed. She should get over Tatum, the redhead was right about that. Rolling over so she could stare at the ceiling, Mackenzie mulled over the idea of cutting the redhead from her life. If she was honest with herself, she wasn't exactly sure how she would do it. What was she supposed to do with herself if she did that?

Huffing, she shuffled around on the bed until she was comfortably against the wall. It was an absurd question, now that she repeated it in her mind again. Of course she could survive without Tatum, she was the Mack Daddy for god sake. She didn't need to be hung up on some little red head first year who wanted nothing to do with her. Why did she feel like her world might possibly come crashing down if Tatum wasn't in it? Once again Sera's voice started nagging in the back of her mind.

"I've seen you interested plenty of times before and you didn't do anything like this."

Groaning, Mackenzie buried her head in her hands. It was the only explanation for everything, the only way that it all fit together. She was in love with Tatum Donnelly, there was just no way around it.

Blue Ridge School of Witchcraft and Wizardry