Current mood:

sad

Slacking
I been falling behind on the updating of the 365 thing. Rock of Love 2 comes on tonight :) And tonight is Mark's last night here but you know what? who cares....He hasn't called or texed me and thats fine but to have his other friends text me to invite me to your going away party is just cruddy, i told his friends he better have lost his fingers or something cuz if he isnt inviting me himself then im not going.

In other news, I was going through old text messages to clear out some space and I saw all of these really old nice texts from Matt and it made me incredibly sad. I feel like I lost him as a friend because of his whole ex gf issue....its his life so i never stepped up and interfered with that subject but its killing me. I text him when I pulled myself together and he immediately texted me back and he seemed like he wanted to talk to me and it made me happy but then again, he used to be the one to text me all the time out of the blue....i dont get a hi from him or anything anymore....I just want my friend back.

Also I haven't talked to James much lately, that makes me sad too because i feel like we are really drifting apart as well. When i do catch him, he is really busy or I am and we make our convos short. I don't think he likes me as much as he used to.

One of the biggest reasons i dont want to go to NJ is because i dont think Matt will hang out with me, and if he does it will be akward or different....he wont stay the night, we wont be close...i can just tell.

In any case, life goes on.