phoebe ❀ (feebees) wrote in valesco,
@ 2014-02-16 14:06:00

Entry tags:

DEDALUS
"Dedalus, have you seen Elphias?"

Phoebe stood in the doorway of Dedalus Diggle's office, hands clasped together in front of her, a nervous look in her eyes. She was using every fiber in her being to maintain her composure, to keep her cool. She just needed to know if--she wasn't sure what she really needed right now, because the thought that Elphias had explained his...his...if he had told Dedalus and not her, Phoebe wasn't sure how well she would be able to handle it.

She simply didn't understand. She didn't....she knew that they'd had their fights, which were mostly her letting out her frustrations, but...but she'd always tried so hard to be with Elphias, to be there for Elphias, so what...what had changed? Was it supposed to be so hard? Phoebe couldn't honestly believe that she'd missed the signs, she knew she hadn't ignored...Her eyes shut for a moment, and she let out a shaky breath, trying to seem concerned, but not give away how ready she was to lose absolutely control of herself.

Her eyes shot open and she batted them prettily, smiling quickly at Dedalus to keep his concern at a minimum. She straightened her back and looking quickly around the office. "I'm sorry to bother you so late."

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violetto_phat
2014-02-16 09:19 pm UTC (link)

He hadn't expected anyone to bother him for a while, so when he heard his name being spoken by a familiar voice in his doorway, he jumped a little due to surprise. He was lucky to not knock over the well of ink he kept dipping his quill in, writing his progress notes for that day's sessions. When he saw Phoebe Doge was the person whose voice had broken through the silence, he had to be curious as to what brought her to see him. She was questioning him about whether she had seen Elphias, so that alone caused him to furrow his brows, clearly confused.

"Don't be sorry, you're not bothering me, I was just..." he trailed off, gesturing to the paperwork that was sprawled out in front of him. "Come in. Close the door behind you, if you'd please." He invited her inside with a wave of his hand, putting the pieces of parchment back into their designated folders so that he could fold his arms across his desk once he was situated.

"What's going on?" The question may seem to have come out of no where, so he'd explain. "Don't get me wrong, I'm glad to see you, but I have to wonder what made you come all the way to Mungo's just to ask me if I've seen your husband. I haven't, by the way; not for quite some time."

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feebees
2014-02-16 10:24 pm UTC (link)

"You haven't...seen..."

Phoebe's eyes dropped to the floor, planted to the spot. She should thank him and leave. She should tell him that it was nothing, that she was just concerned, and leave. Because...because Elphias had left, and he hadn't told her, and he hadn't told his brother, and now, he hadn't told Dedalus...He'd just left, leaving only a letter behind. Not only a letter...their home, their life, their son...her, he'd left her behind.

Phoebe's shoulders shook as she tried to fight her calm expression from cracking, from displaying the fact that she had absolutely no bloody idea what was going on, so--so---

Her hand reached into the pocket of her cloak, taking hold of the letter she'd raveled and unravelled at least a hundred times in the past hour. She made to open it up again, but realizing that now that she had no hope as to finding out where Elphias had gone, she found that she couldn't. Phoebe's hands shook, and the harder she tried to make them stop, the more frantic they became.

"He left---he left--he left this...he left," she let out hollowly, dropping the parchment finally and covering her face with her hands as she began to cry. "He left!"

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violetto_phat
2014-02-16 10:59 pm UTC (link)

He carefully studied her as she neglected to move from her place in the doorway even after he had invited her inside. She looked...traumatized, though since she had yet to answer his question, he didn't know why. He moved very slowly as he stood up from his desk, not wanting to startle her and cause her to flee before she sat down and told him what was happening. He stepped carefully towards her, his eyes drifting down to the letter she pulled out of her pocket before she suddenly broke down crying, following the parchment as it floated to the ground. His jaw tensed at her explanation, leaning down to grab the parchment, wanting to get her out of the doorway before he did anything else.

"Come on, sit down," he insisted, a hand going to her back in order to lead her to his desk chair since it was much more comfortable. He made it a point to shut the door to guarantee no one would disturb them, one or two charms placed on it to make it sound proof; he did it to ensure patient confidentiality, but right now he wanted to be able to speak with Phoebe and get to the bottom of this.

Elphias had left? It just...it didn't make any sense. He poured her a cool glass of water, placing it in her hands before he finally unraveled the piece of parchment that she had dropped; the one his best friend had allegedly left behind. He recognized the handwriting to be his immediately, reading and re-reading the letter a few times, hoping he would understand it after a while. He assumed it was what Phoebe had been trying to do, based on how creased the folds were. One of his hands lifted up, pushing back some of his hair before he looked over at his friend's wife - a woman who had become his friend over time, even though they didn't see each other as often as they did back when they were all in Hogwarts.

"When did you find this?" He asked, able to keep his voice calm after years of practice, though there was emotion in it than there would have been if he was speaking to one of his patients. It didn't really matter when she had found it, since it shouldn't have been left for her to find as far as he was concerned, but he had to wonder if she had sat around waiting a few days, hoping he would come back before she had sought out his best friend, looking for answers he unfortunately didn't have. He couldn't imagine what she was going through, but he took a seat on his desk so that he wasn't hovering over her.

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feebees
2014-02-17 12:07 am UTC (link)

He was gone, he was gone! Elphias really had left her, he'd really left! It--it---the pain was overwhelming, the anger...the guilt. She should have worked harder, she should have figured things out, she should have been able to stop this. Phoebe held tightly onto the glass of water in her hand but she couldn't bring herself to take a drink in fear she might choke. How could she have let this happen? What did any of this mean? Was he asking for a divorce, is that what he wanted?

The words of his letter repeated over and over and over in her head. He said he loved her, but that they'd married so young, was that a problem? He didn't know how much of a shock this would be? How could she---did Elphias think that she had wanted him to---What other lies had he been telling her? How much of his life had Elphias been hiding?

If she and Leo weren't his purpose, then...then...

Taking in some deep breaths, Phoebe frowned deeply and waved her hand about, "About--an hour. I got home from the office and---and that was on the kitchen table. Leo--Leo was with Mycroft and so---I asked if Elphias said when he'd be back, and---and nothing---" Phoebe shook her head and put the glass on Dedalus' desk. "How could he just--without telling anyone? Dedalus, I don't---"

What was wrong with her? What kind of woman's husband just up and left with a letter? Signed in regards. REGARDS!

"We've been having...problems, but---but---to just leave!" Phoebe's voice went up a few octaves, completely heartbroken and confused. She would never have just dropped things! She'd suffered through so much for Elphias, and this is what he did to her?

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violetto_phat
2014-02-17 01:48 am UTC (link)

Dedalus couldn’t tell what was making him the most upset; watching Phoebe cry, knowing that his best friend had just abandoned his wife and child to ‘go find himself’, or, more selfishly, knowing that he might not have found out about Elphias leaving if she didn’t seek him out, hoping that maybe he had said goodbye. He was angry with Elphias for doing this to her - to them. He was angry that his best friend had been a coward, not even having the nerve to tell her to her face that he was going to leave. He hadn’t even said goodbye to his son.

He knew that Elphias hadn’t come to him about this because Dedalus would have tried to talk him out of making such a life altering decision. Still, he would have tried to help. He wasn’t sure what he would have been able to do, but he would have tried regardless. Instead, he had made a decision on his own that he would have to live with for the rest of his life.

Was he expecting things to go back to normal when he returned? Did he even anticipate returning at all? He wasn’t sure what to believe. All he knew was that Elphias was smarter than this. He wasn’t a selfish, spontaneous person, generally speaking. How long had he been planning this? Was he really so miserably with his home life?

He had just as many questions running through his head as he was sure Phoebe did.

Dedalus reached out to place his hand on Phoebe’s shoulder, trying to comfort her in some way. He felt helpless, not knowing what to say. She wasn’t a patient, he couldn’t just detach himself from the situation. “I don’t understand it either…but I’m sorry he did this to you, Feebs.” And he was. He truly did feel sorry for her. This was terrible. She deserved more than this, after everything.

"I know he wasn't lying about loving you..." He didn't say the words in an attempt to make him seem like less of a villain, but to give her some solace. Knowing how his friend felt about the woman sitting before him made this all the more difficult to believe. He could never in a million years think about doing this to Eliza, or the kids. They were what kept him sane after all these years; he'd be absolutely lost without them. For Elphias to feel lost with his family was a startling revelation.

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