Who: Isobel Egg and Archie MacMillan
What: Last minute business and awkwardness
Where: His office
Isobel Egg wondered if the ministry knew how ugly and stuffy it was.
Which was probably a very skewed judgment of the brightly lit corridors and the various pieces of artwork that hung on the walls. If
anything, the place made a very serious attempt to be a comfortable working environment, but Izzie was in no state to appreciate anything
nice. She'd already been here more often than she ever wanted to be (
once, she never wanted to come here
once), but
now she was back here again, twice in the span of two weeks.
That was simply far too much for a person to handle.
She stiffly crossed her arms over her chest, ankles twisted around each other under her chair. Definitely not a chakra improving position, but Isobel's entire vibe and
life had been thrown off kilter lately. All because of some stupid spells that some stupid man was
so uptight and couldn't realize that she wasn't hurting anyone with her
soothing spells.
Right.
Her eyes were locked on the tiled floor as she waited for her appointment to begin. She had to sign some more papers or whatever; a lot of bullshit, really. She didn't even lift her head as an oddly familiar set of shoes entered her gaze. Nope. Definitely not looking up.
Definitely not acknowledging him. Nope.
"Nope."
Arcturus MacMillan rubbed his brow tiredly. This was so much more trouble than it was worth. He probably overreacted slightly, but it was protocol! He had to! There were some things that people upholding the Ministry statutes were supposed to be honor-bound to, and he was only following his duty.
So why was that so terrible?
No reason. Because it wasn't terrible. It most certainly was not.
And that's the mantra he kept repeating to himself as he walked into the room and saw one Isobel Egg staring very determinedly at the tile.
"It most certainly is not." He paused. "Wait, 'no' what?"
He really was standing right there. How was this happening? Izzie had known that there was a high chance of running into Archie (or
Arcturus as she'd found out by snooping near his desk) in this office--it was where he
worked, after all, but she thought that the fates might take pity on her and have him home sick with some godawful flu.
All right, that was a little mean, but it was very hard to have nice thoughts about this man when he was currently the bane of all that was harming her existence. Isobel was
sure that if she'd gotten a less stuck up official to come down to her place, they would've just--they would've just been
okay with things and have left it alone until muggles started to notice. But
no, she was a miscreant.
"
Nope, not dealing with you right now," she said, finally pulling her eyes off the floor to face Archie. Isobel's lips were pressed in a hard line, head twitching to the right to suggest not-so-subtly that he keep on moving.
"Well, it might be a little difficult to not deal with me," he said, pulling out his chair and sitting in it. "Considering this is my general work are and your appointment is with me."
He added that part a
little gleefully. It wasn't really that he wanted to see this woman suffer, or that he particularly enjoyed causing her pain, but she was just being so obstinate and determined to make this his fault, that he didn't object so much to making her uncomfortable. Because it was all her fault, anyway, who asked her to open that silly yoga studio and put a bunch of spells clear as day around it and then invite a herd of Muggles in and perform charms on them! He had no choice but to valiantly uphold the Secrecy Statutes set down by some predecessor or other.
"Right, er, shall we begin?"
At least it was bound to be interesting.
"No!"
Isobel shot to her feet, hands flailing out in disapproval, sending her rolls of parchment flying across the room. No,
no, she'd asked specifically
not to have to deal with him anymore and that she'd cause a
riot. Apparently, the ministry did not take her very serious threats seriously, because Isobel literally felt like her head was going to pop off of her neck and start rolling around and--
---breathe.
Breathe.
Fine. They were going to torture her some more? Fine. This must be some divine intervention of some sort, and just another obstacle she was going to have to overcome to move on with her life and become a better person. Yes, all she had to do was breathe, sit down, sign some papers, and smile and leave. That was it. That was all she'd have to do to remove Arcturus MacMillan from her life once and for all.
"Fine," she answered smoothly, her transition from overly annoyed to calm and serene nearly scaring herself. No, no. She could do this; it would be worth it.
Politely not making comment to her momentary outburst (she did seem to have a lot of them, though, didn't she?), Archie bowed his head and rummaged a bit furiously for papers that were sitting right on top of the stacks.
This was certainly going to be an interesting hour. For although she drove him slightly crazy, Isobel Egg was also rather fascinating to him. He did fear for his life and bodily safety when he was in close proximity with her, but that was generally irrelevant.
When he heard the affirmative from her, he passed her a roll of parchment. "This document is to signify that you were using magic in an illegal manner on your studio. Sign on the X."
Maybe this would be it. Maybe she could just sign the parchment and be on her merry way, life going back to normal. Maybe she could kind of understand why she was in trouble--maybe. In all of her defensive states Isobel had definitely blocked off any logical stances as to why it could cause trouble, having these invisible charms around the studio.
Muggles could get addicted to the feeling, she supposed. And then what happened if she took them down for repair? Oy, that could cause trouble. Or what if--well, she hadn't really thought of anymore ways for things to go wrong, but the fact that she'd come up with
one was a big deal to her. Not that she'd ever admit it to Archie--Arcturus, of course.
She signed with a flourish, and held the quill up incase there was another spot to sign.
"Lovely, thank you," Archie said absently, taking the parchment and handing her another one while making a small note on a clipboard hovering next to him.
Well, this was quite nice! She was being cooperative! This was very lovely indeed! Then they could put this whole fiasco behind them and move on in a very nice, very lovely manner. Brilliant!
"Then if you could sign this one, which states you will not employ any more magic on your studio once we have the wards officially removed."
Isobel couldn't help but wince when he explained this one. Many of the spells she had on the place were very useful and didn't affect the muggles at all. Like her filing cabinet kept things in order because she was such a scatterbrain with paperwork. Like--like the bell that rang in the backroom so she could hear when someone came in through the front and--and a whole lot of other little things she took for granted. Oh, hell, her life was going to be so much harder now.
Biting the inside of her cheek to try and calm herself from the worries that had just surfaced, Isobel pressed a breath out of her nose and signed the parchment. She could almost feel the magical binding in the ink and she looked up at Archie,
"Is that it?"
"Well, er, no, there are quite a few more," Archie explained, casting a side-ways glance at the small pyramid of rolls to his right.
Hopefully that didn't mean things were getting more difficult. Archie could very easily deal with simple restlessness or boredom, but if she started throwing things at him, they might have a problem.
But Isobel Egg didn't look like she had a good arm.
Sort of.
"There is this one, which says you give us permission to monitor your studio for a probationary period of two years, with your own probational officer, to ensure no more wards go up with or without your permission." Archie cleared his throat.
Merlin's left---Isobel bit her tongue however. Who the hell did this guy think she was? A mass murderer? A baby eater? Like,
what? She was going to have a probation officer? The image of some giant following her around for the next two years popped into her head. It made her see red, too, but Isobel reminded herself that being calm and cool and collected was going to make her life that much better. Much, much better, because she would never have to deal with this man again. Ah--she could just feel the fresh breath of air she would take when she left the ministry's walls.
After signing what felt like a thousand documents, Isobel slumped back into her chair and looked up at Archie with tired, but dutiful eyes. This was really taking a toll on her patience, and proved that she
needed to get back to work before she gave herself a conniption.
"Is
that it?"
It had been a long, arduous process, handing roll after roll to Isobel, who seemed to get more agitated with each one. It seemed a little bit contradictory to Archie that a woman like Isobel Egg did yoga.
But it wasn't any of his business.
He tried, valiantly, to make small talk during the long minutes she had been signing papers, to no avail. It felt like if she did answer a question, it was either a curt response or a biting one.
But he supposed he couldn't entirely blame her.
"Er, just the one left," Archie sighed, partly with relief but partly from stress, and gave it to her. "It's just saying you won't, er, sue us for anything involved in this dilemma and the Ministry isn't liable for, well, anything."
After the scribbling ceased, he looked up brightly. "Well, then, that's that, I suppose! You're free now! And with a minimal fine and hardly a mention on your record, I'd say this went quite well!"
Even though his last little spiel included a fine and making sure that she wouldn't sue, Isobel couldn't stop herself from being amused at how genuinely happy he seemed to be about ending this ordeal. Maybe because he too was thinking about how they'd never have to see each other again, or maybe because he was actually and honestly just a good worker who liked seeing the rules be followed.
Izzie was putting her money on never having to see her face again.
"Woo hoo!" she let out softly and quite sarcastically, but there
may have been a slight twinge of a smile playing on her face. Okay,
okay, so Archie's by-the-book ways amused her now that she was out of his hair. Of course she was quickly reminded of all the work she had to put into her studio now, but at least this tension was over and done with.
"Well--all right. Thank you, I suppose," she said with a widening of her eyes before she slipped her purse back over her shoulder. She was definitely not going to apologize for any of her inappropriate behavior; he could just believe for the rest of his life that she was a nutter.
Archie had often been accused of insane behavior.
Not insane in a very loud, or obvious way, but he would occasionally do things that would make people scratch their heads, look at each other in wonder and ask, "...
why?"
Archie hadn't really confronted any of these people on why they had such outrageous opinions about him, but he, perhaps, began to see some validity in their thinkings, because he found himself going, "Oh, er, Miss Egg, I wonder if you would very much mind, in two to three days time, of course, after the wards on your studio have been removed, if you would, er... well, if you would have dinner with me?"
"
What?"
It wasn't even--she couldn't even decipher the emotion behind the squeak she'd just let out. Had he--had he
really just asked her out on a--a date? Dinner, he wanted her to have dinner with him. That was ridiculous and the absolute last thing she ever,
ever thought would ever be happening to her and---
what? What was he up to? Why would Archie even think for a bloody second that she would want to spend time with him outside of the ministry and outside of his bloody rules and sanctions against her and her use of magic?
"I--you--"
He had her completely befuddled, and Isobel's face grew a deep red from embarrassment and anger and confusion and--and she didn't know
what, but it wasn't good, it was definitely not good. It made her all--
squishy all over, and squishy was never a good feeling,
never. "You--you!"
Before thinking, she reached out and---she didn't
smack him, it was just a rather hard
tap on the cheek, followed by a few more, as if she were trying to will Archie to snap out of whatever delusional state he'd found himself in and
think about what he'd just said. And maybe they got a bit harder each time, but none of them could be considered a
smack.
"What is wrong with you?!"
"All right, all right, I'm sorry!" Archie squawked, moving wildly to escape the hand intent on slapping his face.
Well, that had spectacularly blown up. He really didn't even know how it came out, it just
did and then before he even fully comprehended what it was that came out of his mouth, her hand just came out of
nowhere with the purpose of slapping him in a fashion to make his
teeth rattled, and it
stung and he was just--
"It just, it slipped out, I don't even know, look, just, just take your copies and, and, leave, that's just, that's--"
Why him? Why
him?
WHY?
Again! Again, her lips twitched into what
might be a smile, and it would've been if she hadn't been so thoroughly confused by this man. Maybe she was just laughing at his pain and embarrassment, that could definitely be it. Oh, if her students could see her now---Izzie shut her eyes, trying to regain that calm state she'd put herself in a few minutes...er...probably an hour ago. Right. Well. It had just slipped out? As in...he'd been thinking about asking her on a date?
Why? She'd yelled at him and embarrassed him and hit him (oy, she'd actually hit him the other day) and had been quite the thorn in his side for the past two, three weeks. So why would he still want to spend time with her? Did he think that was going to please her enough so that she wouldn't bother his department anymore? He'd already gotten her to sign that stupid parchment saying she couldn't sue--so---
what?
"I---well! I mean---" Why couldn't she just say
no? Damn this Hufflepuff intuition, she was even starting to see the good side of
him. "I--well.
Well, I guess you
have caused me enough trouble."
Isobel batted her eyes for a moment, "You know. To feel like you--owe me."
He froze momentarily. She had gone from to flat-out refusal to a conditional yes. Owing her... owing her... but, but what did that mean? She wasn't going to do something terrible to him, right? He had heard about crazy yoga-following types who did frightening things in their spare times and were deviant sexuals and such--what
if she was like that? What if--
But she was on the small, blonde side. That did look less threatening than if she had been a six foot redhead, or something to that effect. And just because she bent into funny, unnatural shapes didn't neccessarily mean she was evil.
Perhaps he didn't regret it slipping out as much as he thought he had.
Sort of.
"Is that... er, is that a yes?"
"I---suppose it is."
Even Isobel had to stop and hear the words over in her head again. She'd just said yes to a--date, with Archie MacMillan. One that would probably end up in bickering and fighting and maybe even drink tossing, but she'd accepted it. Bloody hell, why did she have to have a good natured soul deep, deep (well, not
so deep) down? He just looked so--
honest, that she would feel even worse denying him and...ergh.
She lifted her chin in an attempt to maintain some sort of snooty I-don't-really-care expression; Archie didn't need to know that she was actually thinking about this in ways other than a payback. Because that's all it
really was, to her, but her very vibrant mind couldn't help but think of any other possibilites.
"Well, you--have my address, so." Of course he did, he'd sent her enough warning owls, "You can just--owl me."
Izzie nodded as if it was her final statement, and she shifted her purse on her shoulder looking more than uncomfortable.
"Oh, er, goo-good then. I will, I will definitely owl you."
Well, that could've been worse.
Well, no, not really, it couldn't have been, but he did ask her to dinner (sort of) and she did accept (kind of) and so they had something to look forward to (in a way). All in all, this was something that could be added to the "SUCCESS" column.
"So now that we have, er, all this cleared I suppose we are... done?"
This was the most awkward situation she'd ever been in during the course of her entire life. Isobel blinked slowly up at Archie a few times before finally nodding and shifting her bag to the opposite shoulder with a clearing of her throat.
"Er--yes. We're done."
She nodded again and waited for him to leave, but then realized that he was probably waiting for
her to leave, and that if she waited for Archie to make the first move then they'd be there for hours and--right. Isobel put up her hand in a short, curt wave and turned on a heel to leave the office.
What the hell had she just gotten herself into?
