She, too, slowed her ambling fingers, then stopped moving them all together upon sensing a shift in the mood. Saoirse couldn't say she was expecting the topic he settled on, as Howell rarely spoke of his family unprompted, but her surprise concerning it was not discomforting. Instead it settled her, for she always enjoyed when he spoke of his siblings and mother, and looked forward to his stories; even the smallest of accounts warmed her heart with how passionately and lovingly he spoke of them.
Did he feel guilty over the date of his last visit? Surely, she knew, they would understand, as the last few months had not been easily managed, so he shouldn't feel...
Saoirse blinked blankly. That had not been... it was not out of disbelief, but a need to verify what she thought she had heard that moved her to quickly pick her head from his shoulder to take in Howell's face fully. As she searched it intensely, and his words began to sit, she felt her eyes began to water minimally, but that was by no means an indicator of the wave to come. When it was clear that he truly meant to share this important aspect of his life with her, Saoirse felt an overwhelming wave of emotion flood her so completely that before she could realize it was happening, she burst into tears.
She supposed they could be blamed on exhaustion, or that encompassing notion she frequently experienced when she with him, but Saoirse knew, truly, she would be lying to herself if she believed that. Her sudden and fierce tears were rooted in how deeply touched his invitation made her feel, that was obvious. Howell's family was very important to him (how many times had she quieted his feverish cries over his brother and sister's futures? Promised him that his mother was capable of providing for them without him?) and the thought that she worthy for them, when she had so little to offer in return...
But thoughts of her own family could not be permitted, now. Her tears were of the happy kind, not sad, and for once she wanted to experience what that felt like. Still horrible, but at least a bit more emotional intimate, which she always tried to be with Howell. Saoirse kept her hand locked with his, though now her clutch was significantly tighter, as she dropped her head to her chest.
"I would--- like that---" she mustered between heaves, nodding fervidly. "--- Very much."
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