「∂arien → ∂obbs」 (littled) wrote in valesco,
@ 2013-02-18 00:18:00

Entry tags:

[Dianna!]
Emma Sophia Dobbs. Emma Sophia Dobbs. Emma Sophia Dobbs.

The name kept racing through Darien's head as he stared numbly, passively at the sleeping bundle of blankets in the playpen, and yet he still could somehow not connect it to the tiny human that laid there, blissfully unaware of the turmoil currently swirling through her father's--hah, father, it was still such a joke--head.

It had been two months almost since this "Emma Sophia" had been dropped on his doorstep, for lack of a better term, and still he couldn't quite wrap his mind around this crazy idea that he had a kid. A kid. What did that mean? It sounded stupid, but he still hadn't the slightest notion of what that entailed.

After the yelling had stopped, his parents had quickly taken the little girl in, knowing full well that there was no way their irresponsible 21-year-old son was going to know what to do with this situation, especially when sprung on him out of the blue as it had been. They had hoped that, some way, a couple months might pass and they could prepare him before handing her over. After all, they were not about to fix this for him, nor start over again on raising children--it wasn't that he blamed them for any of it, but--

What did he do? He still didn't know what to do with this. Here she was. She was home, in his living room, where she should have been, and yet he felt as helpless as ever.

He could have called Derek. He wanted to call Derek, because as much as he hated to admit it, his big brother was smart and level-headed and responsible and everything that he wasn't and that must mean that he would be able to tell him how to do this, right? But that was not an option. Talking to Derek meant that he had to withstand more of the judging stares, the judging tone, the judging everything that said how little respect he had for his younger brother, exactly because of things like this. He didn't blame him for it, but his brother was the one person whose criticisms stung the most. His parents and everyone else could yell at him and berate him all day, but when it was Derek, it was different.

So he had called Dianna. Dianna wasn't so bad as a second option, right? She had the female thing going for her at least, and she was his twin and he trusted her, and--

Christ, he was so out of his depth.

Sucking in a deep breath, he tangled his fingers back through his hair, about ready to pull it all out. "I am such an idiot," he moaned, certainly not for the first time in the past two months.

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babyd
2013-02-17 09:15 pm UTC (link)

"I've been telling you that since I could form complete sentences," Dianna drawled, her eyes not lifting from her perfectly manicured nails. Her desire to be here was next to nothing, but her conscience had guilted her into being there for her brother, sure that she would be walking into the worst possible scenario she could imagine. When Dianna arrived and the baby was sleeping and not crying, missing, or dying, well. She could not understand Darien's need for her company.

Dianna's legs crossed and then crossed again and she peered toward the playpen. While Emma's appearance had been a shock, it was most certainly not a surprise. Darien was good looking and attracted girls easily, as all Dobbs men (and women, to be honest) were prone to do. The baby was the product of a random encounter with probably a more random woman, and it was only fair that Darien had to reap what he sowed.

Literally.

She probably should not be so cold. This was her niece, and seeing as Derek was not going to make her an aunt again any time soon (and she would hardly count Ackerly offspring until she and Felix were wed), she supposed she should love this girl. And she did, when there weren't dirty diapers to be changed or eardrum shattering screams being shrieked. Dianna did feel a tug of love, of compassion for the little girl, because it was not Emma's fault that her brother was an idiot. That little baby was a Dobbs, and no matter the circumstances, it deserved her love.

"It has not been so bad," she said, not daring to move closer to the playpen, in case she woke the child. With the museum, wedding planning, Penelope being in the hospital, Dianna had been granted no real time to spend with her brother and niece. Not that she desired to babysit in any sense, but. "I'm sure when she gets a little older it will be easier. She'll do more than eat and sleep."

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littled
2013-02-18 05:08 am UTC (link)

Why did he need Dianna there? That was something that even Darien himself didn't know, but he knew that he did need her. Or someone--anyone. Because in truth, Emma wasn't terrifying in and of herself, but in those quiet moments when they were left alone together, in his small flat, to just be in each other's company... it was that which was maddening to him. He would have done anything to keep some kind of constant visitor around, just so that he didn't have to be alone with her.

What if he did something wrong and no one was there to pick up the pieces? His parents--they had tried to teach him what to do, and at times he had even felt like he was getting the hang of it, but that didn't squelch the fear at the idea of messing up when it came to really doing this on his own. He wasn't fit out to be a father, or at least not on this kind of short notice. He couldn't even feel a connection with this kid because--hell, she was already five months old. Emma was his daughter, but as much as he wanted to, he just couldn't feel anything, and what if that alone caused him to--

He still had to take care of her. Darien hated that fact the most. He was being put in charge of this life that he hadn't even known existed, and had no time to prepare for or develop feelings over. It seemed wrong and unfair, for the both of them. Regardless of anything, he did feel that Emma deserved better than this.

"Why didn't she tell me?" he finally spoke, eyes staring blankly past Dianna and into the far wall. He wasn't even sure if he was talking to his sister or not, but it was a question he had needed to get out for a while. "I mean--she didn't have to let me be involved, just--she never even bothered to tell me--" --and he knew that Emma's mother knew who he was; they had had evidence enough to track him down after her death, after all. "If I had known, I could have--"

What? He didn't know that either. Darien just felt like, if he had known he was going to have a kid before the fact, maybe something would have been different. At the very least, he might have been a hair more emotionally prepared to take responsibility, did something unfortunate happen to her mother. But like this, it was-- "This is impossible."

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