WHO: Mackenzie and Sebastian Goldstein
WHAT: Reacting to the news and divulging some secrets
WHERE: Goldstein Castle
WHEN: Later in the day



Mackenzie stared fixedly into space, her head cocked slightly as she absentmindedly rocked her son back and forth in her arms. Today had supposed to be a good day, an average, nothing-special day with little to remember it by. She had actually been looking forward to the routine of going to work, eating in for lunch, going back to work, and then going home for the night. It was monotonous, yes, but at least productive and something that she could control.

Unlike right now, where she felt like everything was too out of control, and in a very bad way.

Sebastian had shaken her awake early this morning, not stopping until she had promised to not leave the house for the rest of the day for any reason. And then, without any sense of explanation, he was gone, off with nothing else to say except that to not open the front door. Period. It took a while for Mackenzie to process this strange precession of events, but once they sunk in, it only took her a few seconds to race to the wireless.

She didn't know what she had been expecting to hear, and she most definitely did not expect to be struck so hard by the news.

Evan was dead.

Because he had killed the Minister.

Anthony had long fallen asleep but Mackenzie continued to hold him, fearing that if she did put him out of her immediate grasp, then she herself would break apart. The full understanding of what was happening was, as always, not hard to grasp, yet still Mackenzie found herself feeling very much lost. Absolutely no emotion was coursing through her, nothing was going through her mind. The fact that Sebastian had seemingly known some idea about what had happened at such a peculiar time did not bother her, nor did she honestly question where he was. Everything was just... happening, and she was watching with glazed over eyes because that was all she could muster.

"Oh," Mackenzie broke her own silence at the sight of Sebastian suddenly standing in front of her. Despite feeling so cold, she felt her chest breathe a feeling of life, giving an ache of pain as she looked at him. Her jaw set itself deeper into a flat line.

Sebastian was wishing that he'd never woken up this morning. He wished that he hadn't heard Moody's alarmingly loud patronus (how it managed not to wake Mackenzie was beyond him) and he wished he hadn't joined the bloody Order of the Phoenix in the first place. The minister was dead, and while Sebastian knew that should be his number one concern, the fact that Moody had slayed his assassin and revealed it to be Evan Rosier was the only thing he could think about.

It just had to be him, didn't it? It couldn't have been one of those faceless death eaters that they found every day, no, of course not. Evan Rosier had to be the idiot given the mission to kill the minister, and had some how succeeded. Of course he was taken down almost immediately, but it didn't change the fact that one of Mackenzie's best friends was the man who'd murdered Minister Corner Conway.

None of it made any sense. How could this happen with the security, with the Order's security? Had someone slipped, messed up? Did the death eaters know more than the Order thought they did? How was his wife, his beautiful, loving, caring wife, best friends with a murdering death eater? Because there was no denying it, now. No matter how they both turned away from the subject (not as often as in the beginning of their marriage, but enough), there was now simply no way that either of them could ignore the fact that Evan Rosier had been terribly close to everything in their lives. Sebastian shuddered as he walked through the front door at the thought of how many times Rosier had been within the house (and probably a few times he did not know about).

At least he knew from the Order that Dearborn had been a spy. Sebastian put up the front of still despising the man (and he did somewhat, for how he'd hurt Mackenzie), but he knew the truth and that let him have some sort of hope that this wouldn't happen again. Of course it had, and he waited for Mackenzie to notice him before saying anything.

Except he didn't know what to say. There was nothing he could say, because any sort of condolence would be perceived as a lie, and he'd already fucked up by leaving her alone all day. It wouldn't take long before Mackenzie questioned where he had been, and he looked too tired and ragged to say he'd been called into work, to try and get the first photos of the scene. Which he had; he felt a bit like Spiderman when it came to his job.

"I went to help," Sebastian said, feeling his chest clench. It felt like the end of the world. "I went to help people who are fighting against the death eaters and wanted me to join them and help them. We would have stopped Evan if we had known what he was doing, but it was too late. I'm sorry your friend is dead."

Sebastian lowered his gaze, knowing that may have been the single dumbest thing he'd ever said, but he could not think of anything else. There was nothing in the world he could have done but tell Mackenzie the truth, and the Order of the Phoenix was a very big part of the truth.

Despite hearing Sebastian perfectly clearly, Mackenzie repeated his words over in her mind as if unable to understand them. Though admittingly, she was struggling to understand; it took a very long time for her merely put together what exactly he was saying, let alone understand what its true meaning was. She stared back blankly at him as her mind processed this new reveal slowly, Mackenzie herself barely moving while doing so.

Eventually, however, a breakthrough did occur, and her head cocked to the side in confusion at him. So Sebastian had joined--- a resistance force? Against He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and his followers. Yes, that was what he was saying. Helping. Because--- they had asked them to. And Evan---- the sudden mention of Evan sparked Mackenzie's mind into a kind of frenzied state she had not thought possible. Thoughts upon questions upon concerns upon demands all flooded to the back of her mind, each one more commanding than the next.

What was he doing, trying to get himself killed? Those people were highly dangerous, her brother no doubt with a special vendetta for Sebastian's blood! Who were these people, to just recruit who they wanted? Had he seen things that people only whispered about? The reason Sebastian why knew what happened first was not because of his work, but because he was there first to fight.

Fight? That achingly sick feeling in her stomach attained a new level of power as it reared back to life. Sebastian? Fighting and dueling with death eaters? She should have realized that with all his frustration he would have attempted something to revolt--- but not like this. This was very dangerous, what if something happened to him? What if---

What-- how--- again, Mackenzie struggled with her next thoughts. Was it wrong to push aside Evan's death simply because what he had been doing was wrong? Killing the Minister, yet another entity she was supposed to lay loyalty to. But Sebastian, her Sebastian, how was it possible to fit into the equation that her husband of all people was one of those that was fighting against everything? Mackenzie felt her gaze direct down to Anthony in her arms, and for a few moments she simply stared at him. What kind of life had she brought her son into?

Words were lost to her at this point. She looked back up at Sebastian, completely unable to think of an appropriate response. This was far too much to know, handle even, in one moment, let alone an entire lifetime, so to put everything, or lack of, that was going through her mind would be next to impossible. But she had to say something to him, didn't she? In an attempt to respond, Mackenzie's jaw openly slightly as her shoulders fell in a defeated style.

He held his breath while he waited for Mackenzie's reaction, but it never came. Sebastian let himself take in a deep breath of air and he looked at the ground, somewhat ashamed, but somewhat...relieved? He was relieved that she did not explode like he had imagined in his worst scenarios. Mackenzie unleashing any sort of pent up Slytherin rage was something Sebastian had never seen, and hoped to never see. If she was able to make him feel tremendously guilty over one day calling their son Tony with just a stern glare across the kitchen, Sebastian did not want to be on the receiving end of Mackenzie trying to make a person feel terrible.

Standing did not feel like an option anymore, and Sebastian pulled over a toy chest that his brother had built for Anthony. He hunched forward, elbows pressing into his thighs as he began to think; what next? He should explain more to her. Maybe she wasn't speaking because she didn't understand, but Sebastian knew his wife was smarter than that. He should have told her in the first place, but maybe she did understand that the only reason it had slipped so easily from his mouth just minutes ago was the fact that Evan Rosier was now dead. Sebastian had battled with the guilt of joining the Order without informing his wife for some time, but the idea of Rosier using her to get to Sebastian, to get to the Order...

...just look what he'd done. If You-Know-Who had told him to torture Mackenzie to get information about the Order, no matter how 'close' the two were...Rosier would have done it. There was no doubt in his mind that a death eater's supposed loyalty only drove deep for You-Know-Who. Sebastian could not have subjected his wife to that, but now that Rosier was dead, the threats against them were cut down to a minimum. Her brother wasn't trusted by her any longer, it--things could be better.

"Dumbledore runs it," Sebastian said softly, his hand going out to gently touch Anthony's foot. "They call it the Order of the Phoenix. A lot of people from school have been doing it for years---" His eyes lifted, and he wondered if this would be too much for his wife to handle, but it could maybe help her grief over Rosier, "Dearborn was in the Order. That's why he was killed, he was a spy."

Sebastian couldn't help the short laugh that escaped him. He still found it ridiculous to believe, but that's what it was. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, it---wasn't safe. I wanted to, but I couldn't. There was no way."

Again, Mackenzie stayed quiet to help collect what little thoughts she had circulating left. Or, to simply focus on clear ones long enough for more than a few seconds. Her breathing became quicker with every second, until everything Sebastian was saying finally placed itself neatly together like a puzzle. It was difficult, with the end result being something that she did not like, but at least her glazed-over mind had reached it.

And it was bad. So very bad. Everything was much worse than she had previously believed. How a full-blown fight hadn't broken out into her house was now beyond her, and in a rare feeling, Mackenzie felt actually stupid for letting herself believe that some people just didn't like each other. She knew that all of her former school friends were somehow linked to death eaters one way or another, so why would it be far fetched to think the same for Sebastian's friends? They would just all join together.

How long had it been?

Suddenly Anthony felt too heavy for Mackenzie to hold, her arms failing at the possibility to cradle him a second longer. In a jerky style, finally was able to let go of her son to place him in his cradle. Though, with the loss of his touch, it seemed like a new void filled her. It was undeniable, she couldn't hide the burn in her heart from understanding Sebastian hadn't told her this earlier because he couldn't trust her. Or trust how secret they would be for so long, he couldn't trust her company---

"Because of Evan," Mackenzie croaked, her hands going to her face as she leaned back against the wall limply. Of course, because how could he tell her anything when the very death eater Sebastian was trying to stop would occasionally stop by to catch up for lunch? It was madness, and he had tried to tell her, she could see that now, but she had just refused to listen. "And my brother. And---"

Her hands fell quickly from her face as she looked at Sebastian sharply. "Caradoc---?" Mackenzie's face contorted in a strange manner, reverting back to struggling to understand. Was this a joke? But even through this confusion, she could tell it wasn't. In fact, the more she thought about it, the more it made sense; it explained why Evan had refused to acknowledge his existence anymore, why Matilda could only compare him to dirt, and why Emmet seemed to blame him for everything.

Mackenzie had never felt so blind in her entire life. "I can't believe this," she breathed, her hands going to her face again. Despite wanting nothing more to stare at Sebastian, she couldn't quite bring herself to. "Evan, Caradoc---" She paused, pulling her lips back as she flattened her hair with her hands. "-- you."

You.

Sebastian could not blame his wife for being shocked, he could not blame her for finding all of this surreal and unbelievable. She seemed to understand, but there was a difference between knowing things to be true and actually accepting them. Sebastian knew he was the last person any of his friends from Hogwarts and beyond would think had joined a secret society bent on defeating You-Know-Who.

He couldn't even say the evil wizard's name. In his head it sounded like thunder clapping and there was a constriction in his throat every time Sebastian attempted to say it. He knew that some of the other Order members thought him silly for it, but this was all still very new. Sebastian himself could not believe that he had agreed to join them, to fight alongside the Order of the Phoenix. He still felt like the new kid that everyone watched carefully, just waiting for him to drop out or start crying. Sebastian knew he couldn't, he made this choice and it was an irrevocable one.

"They wanted me to help," he said slowly, trying to explain to Mackenzie and himself why he had accepted their invitation. "They thought I would be someone who could help end this war...how could I say no?"

With a long breath he looked up at his wife, shaking his head. All of the trouble they'd gone through within their short time together had been caused by the ideals of this war. Not one problem had been because of any single thing either of them committed. Every problem was spurred because of the war and who sided with who. Sebastian believed now, with Evan gone, that Mackenzie was ready to choose what side of the war she was really on. There was no hovering in a neutral territory anymore, not after all they had been through.

"I have a chance to end this war, for us and Anthony, and I can't deny that chance," Sebastian said, standing. He moved over to his wife and put out a hand, resting it on her arm. He hated all of the surprises he was throwing at his wife, but an owl perched itself on Anthony's windowsill, and Sebastian was reminded of the meeting they'd had before he returned home. It wasn't safe here, anymore, and the Order was already pushing them out of the house--their castle.

"The Order has been protecting us for weeks, because of the attacks on purebloods who married muggleborns. But...Mackenzie, it's not safe, anymore," he frowned, remembering the fight he had with Longbottom and a few of the other members, "With Conway dead, who knows who'll replace him, and we need to---leave."

Sebastian held his breath for a moment, but continued before she could respond, "Come on, we've got to pack."