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Adelaide had to remind herself to keep breathing. This day was not going like she'd planned it, and that was infuriating her. All she had wanted was to get the hell out of the nursery, and be done with it. She didn't care if she had a million patients left without their healer, she didn't care that Naija would probably hunt her down in her sleep and kill her, she just didn't care. She'd thought she'd be able to handle going back to work, but she couldn't, and when the hell had Adelaide Wei Jordan ever admitted to not being able to do something?

She had taken the news of her injuries from the earthquake relatively well. So, she'd never be able to have kids again, fine. She had to tell women that all the time, and most of them didn't have a great son like Lee at home. So why, why could she be happy with that? She should be happy that she'd gotten the chance to be a mother where others couldn't, and--it just---

God. Adelaide stalked back and forth in the empty room, where a patient had just left. No one would be admitted there for about an hour, so she had time to hide out and be miserable. She knew her husband would come looking for her, but she had no desire to actually seek him out. She knew that they were the experts at tough love, but holy shit. Sometimes you just needed someone to agree with everything you said, no matter how stupid it was.

It wasn't stupid though! Adelaide stopped her rapid pacing and stood in the middle of the room for a moment. She couldn't do it! She couldn't handle never--not even having the chance of having another baby as wonderful as Lee and...oh God, she needed to stop this crying bullshit. She wiped furiously at her face and sunk down to the floor at the foot of the bed, crossing her legs underneath her and looking like a miserable, wreck of a person.