“Because everyone always ends up leaving in the end,” She admitted quietly in response to Tatum’s question to why she’d want the blonde to leave. It killed her to have to admit it to her friend, everyone she ever cared about had abandoned her when the going got tough. Her father, her mother, Abigail, Kia had been the only one to stick with her in the past and she mostly assumed that was because she had to. They were siblings and therefore in Mackenzie’s mind, we required to stick together. Of course, her parents were supposed to do that too but that didn’t work out. “It’s happened way too much for me to try to care about most people. I’m afraid if I really do care about them, I’ll loose them because, well, that’s always what happens to me.” She shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, she didn’t really feel like she was entitled to use it as an excuse for feeling bad about stuff.

Hearing those words from Tatum made her tear up all over again, she felt so safe in the redhead’s arms and in the sincerity of Tatum’s voice that she knew the redhead wouldn’t abandon her. Although the next few words out of the other girls mouth broke her heart all over again, even though she knew that they were coming the whole time. As intimate as their friendship was, there was just no hiding that there might have been something more than friendship. If Frankie were to ever catch wind of this kind of thing, Mackenzie knew the French girl would loose her head. And Mackenzie wouldn’t blame her, she knew that if Tatum was hers then she wouldn’t want anyone else having this kind of contact with her. But that didn’t stop the blonde from wanting it, or getting it when she needed it.

She was a bit surprised when Tatum pressed her on the subject of Abigail, usually Tatum would just leave it be, but she felt like she might as well tell her. It would be the last piece of the puzzle to fit everything into place for the redhead, she had told her everything else about her insecurities.

“I don’t mind telling you, it’s probably about time I told someone besides Kia.” She had to let it go, really, it had been a few years and she couldn’t keep dwelling on it like she did. “Abigail was like, my first everything. We both played Quidditch on the team at Salem and she kind of took me under her wing. She helped me get confident with my self and taught me how to be outgoing. She was there when I started figuring out my sexuality, and well, she was my first girlfriend.” She was kind of crying again, as much as she had promised herself she wouldn’t. But at least she wasn’t sobbing this time, just a light trickle down her face. “She was the first girl I ever loved, and the first girl I ever slept with. She taught me everything, she was like, the love that I never got at home. She was so sweet and gentle.”